


I know it's hard to believe, you're still the biggest part of me

by redsweater



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: (but dw ziam aren't cheating on each other), Alternate Universe, Anal Sex, Angst, Hate Sex, Implied Mpreg, Infidelity, Kidfic, M/M, but there is a happy ending yay, characters being overly confused and having too many feelings, ex husbands, fluff too but mostly angst, many arguments i wont lie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-11
Updated: 2015-06-01
Packaged: 2018-03-30 02:29:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 24,669
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3919492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redsweater/pseuds/redsweater
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Bye, Liam.” Zayn says nicely, daughter there and all. </p><p>“Bye, Zayn.” Liam smiles and waves but Zayn can see the coldness in his eyes, one that nobody else can and only because Zayns also seen the light that used to shine within them, same colour and shape, and yet. The spark has gone. </p><p> </p><p>zayn and liam are ex husbands who hate each other</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hiiii. I've had this fic for a long time, but never bothered to finish it until now. It's not my best work and tbh i just wanted to complete it and get it out of the way so it wasn't always on my mind. 
> 
> Thank you to D for reading over this, pointing out errors and helping me make it better. ilu.
> 
> This is dedicated/for Agnes. Your enthusiasm and kindness has inspired me to finish the fic. Without you, I wouldn't have bothered. I hope you enjoy it. Thank you for being supportive. 
> 
> I also hope everyone else who reads it, enjoys it. (Sorry for always writing angst.)  
> (all errors are my own btw, sorry)

_Liam accidentally bumps into the dining table. "Shhhh," Zayn giggles._

_"Has that been there the whole time?" Liam asks, confused._

_Zayn giggles louder, "I think? It's your house."_

_"Oh." Liam utters, "It is my house." He bursts out laughing and Zayn can't control his laughter either._

_"We have to be quite or mum and dad will hear," Liam wheezes._

_"I know, I'm scared."_

_"Should I carry you on my back?" Liam jokes._

_Zayn cocks his head and considers it for a moment. "Yes." he giggles._

_Liam copies his facial expression then shrugs, "Okay." He turns around and crouches so Zayn can jump on his back. Zayn wraps his legs around Liams waist as he hoists him up. "You're heavier than I remember."_

_"Shh, you peasant." Zayn orders, "Take me to movie world."_

_"Yes sir!" Liam motions and starts swaying, no clue where he's actually going since it's two am in the morning and he can't see shit. He walks forward and bumps into the kitchen bench,  Zayn hisses out loud. "Ouch."_

_"Awe," Liam coos. He puts him down and tackles him onto the tiled floor. It doesn't hurt, the alcohol has set in, to the point where they're completely fucked._

_"Where did I hurt you?" Liam slurs._

_Zayn smirks, "here." He points to his knee, "and here." He says pointing to his lips._

_Liam kisses his knee and moves to kiss his lips. "Anywhere else?" He whispers and the atmosphere is suddenly hot and Zayn really wants his boyfriend to fuck him on this tiled kitchen floor._

_"My dick kind of hurts." Zayn says. There's silence for a couple of seconds before they burst out laughing, louder than they can control._

_"Fucking twat," Liam says._

_"Kiss it, bitch." Zayn orders, pushing Liams head down to his crotch._

_Liam jumps on top of him and bites his cheek, "make me," He growls._

_Zayn fights back and tries to push Liams heavy body off him, it's deemed impossible but they're  both having too much fun, rolling around and play fighting._

_"Who's there?" They hear Liams dad yell._

_They stop and stare at each other with wide eyes. "Fuck," Liam whispers. "Be very quiet and follow every single thing I do." He begins to crawl to the back door and Zayn fights every core in his body not to laugh at how ridiculous he looks. "Shhhhh" Liam whispers very fucking loud._

_Liam reaches up to unlock the door, gently sliding it open. The cold air hits Zayn and he feels goose bumps appear._

_Liam crawls outside then he's instantly up. "Run!" he whispers in a yell and what the fuck. Zayn jumps up, looking between his long gone boyfriend and the door that's still open. He's about to close it but the lounge room light has turned on and fuck it. He's running after Liam-- heart pounding, cool air whipping across his face and body hammering with adrenaline and alcohol._

_Zayn runs after Liam's silhouette down a street, out of breath but the need to catch up with his boyfriend is more important._

_"Boo!" Liam jumps out from behind a car._

_"Fuck," Zayn pants, coming to a stop. He places his hands on his knees and exhales, inhales._

_Liam's laughing hysterically and Zayn can't help but do the same. He's just so fucking happy and his boyfriend is rubbing his hands up and down his cold arms, kissing his neck and cheek and he's fucking in love._

_"I love you," Zayn slurs._

_Liam stops and says, "I didn't hear you, say it louder."_

_Zayn rolls his eyes, "c'mon Lee."_

_"I really didn't hear you." Liam huffs._

_"I love you," Zayn says it louder than before._

_"You what?" Liam yells._

_Ohmygod, Zayn thinks. But Liam's laughing like a hyena--  his smile wide, eyes crinkled and Zayn wants everyone to know. "I love you, Liam!" He screams at the top of his lungs._

_Liam claps like a happy baby and embraces him, kissing his cold lips. After what feels like forever, standing in the middle of an empty street, kissing on a cold winter night, Liam pulls back and wipes his red mouth. "I love you too, Zayn Malik who lives at 2-4 Kemble road." he shouts out laughing._

_"Liam!" Zayn groans and shoves him backwards._

_Liam leaps forward and hugs him so hard, Zayn thinks he may stop breathing. But it's okay, he'll hug him back just as tight._

**\--**

 

Zayn pulls into the gravel driveway, parking behind the white Toyota. He beeps the horn once, hoping Mia is ready to go. Five minutes and another beep later, she evidently isn't. Zayn takes in a deep sigh and gets out of the car. He knew she wouldn't be prepared; it was just wishful thinking on his behalf.

He walks up to the two story brick house, the bitterness he stores away has a habit of appearing whenever he's forced to be here. He rings the doorbell once, the loud sound ringing throughout the large home. He hears a voice, before finally, someone answers the door.

It’s Aaron. Zayn hates life.

“Hello, Zayn. C’mon in, Mia is just packing her bag.” Aaron greets, a wide smile etched on his face. Zayn rather not, but nobody knows how much Zayn dislikes Aaron, so he never show his hostility.

“I thought I told Liam I’d be here 5 pm sharp,” Zayn says, “it’s now 5.10 and she’s still not ready?”

Aaron walks through the front foyer and into the kitchen, Zayn a few steps behind. He’s been in this house countless of times, (unwilling of course,) and til this day, he cannot stand it.

“That’s my fault, actually. We went to the pools today for some swimming lessons and I lost track of time.” Aaron says politely. Always fucking polite, Zayn bitterly thinks.

“Who has swimming lessons on a Saturday?” Zayn asks. He can hear footsteps upstairs, running all over the place. He wonders if Liam is up there with her, helping Mia pack. “Also, I thought she could swim already?”

“She can,” Aaron reassures, “I was helping her with some things she needed more practice on, that was all.”  Zayn tries not to give Aaron the stink eye. As if he needs to be reminded that his fear of swimming-- and fucking water, has stopped him from sharing that bond with his own daughter. This intruder has taken it upon himself to be her father. Zayn doesn't let his mind linger, or else he’ll begin to rage, so he replies, “How nice of you,” without any trace of emotion in his tone. He looks at his watch. Five minutes have only passed, although it feels like he’s been here for hours, trapped within the four walls of doom.

“I’m gonna go check what’s taking her so long,” Zayn says, pointing towards the stairs. Relief seems to wash over Aaron’s face, obviously thankful he doesn’t have to entertain him any longer. It’s been four years since Liam met Aaron, four years since this strange man entered his daughter’s life and four years that Zayn hasn’t accepted it. He doubts he ever will, he shouldn't have too either, he thinks.

“Mia,” Zayn yells from the bottom of the stairs, “I told you 5 pm and you’re late.”

“Hi Baba,” she yells from her room. She comes running out, brown hair all over the place, hazel eyes wide and cheeks red from running. “I’m really sorry, 5 more minutes.” She huffs before stepping back into her room.

Zayn snorts and goes to retrieve his phone. He has dinner reservations for them at her favorite Chinese restaurant. He’d hoped they’d go home first before dinner, seems not though.

Zayn is leaning on the steps railing, scrolling his emails when he hears footsteps approaching him. Zayn senses Liam before he’s seen him.

“Does nobody in this house understand concept of time?” Zayn asks Liam, looking up from his phone.

Liam snorts and leans on the other side of the steps, smiling down to Zayn, “Sorry she’s fifteen minutes late. Does that not sit well with your high class life?” Liam jokes, but deep down, they both know it’s not only a joke. Zayn ignores the hidden implication behind his pun and fakes a smile, “they call it OCD.”

“They call it controlling,” Liam states.

“You’d know all about that, wouldn't you,” Zayn replies a bit too harshly to be considered joking.

Liam only rolls his eyes, ignoring Zayns comment to call out to his daughter, “C’mon, love, Baba’s waiting.”

Zayn holds back the churn of sentiments entering his stomach anytime Liam says Baba, old memories beginning to fly out, no matter how much Zayn tries to lock them away.

Mia is finally ready and Zayn feels his chest lighten, the idea of leaving this house, helping him breathe easier. “I’ll be in the car, say goodbye and don’t be long, missy.”

“Chill, Baba, this is record time for me.” She grins and kisses him on the cheek.

Zayn can never stay annoyed at her, no matter how hard he tries. “I’m serious, Mia.” He says sternly, taking the bag off her.

“Bye, Liam.” Zayn says nicely, daughter there and all.

“Bye, Zayn.” Liam smiles and waves but Zayn can see the coldness in his eyes, one that nobody else can and only because Zayns also seen the light that used to shine within them, same color and shape, and yet. The spark has gone.

You’d think after 8 years of divorce, you wouldn't have to deal with your ex-husband anymore, considering that was the reason for the separation, seems not, Zayn thinks. He still has to listen to Liam’s bickering and complaining, and on top of that, have to deal with Liam’s new partner who came into their life after their divorce. He has to deal with Aaron raising his daughter, with his ex-husband, in a stupid fancy house. Zayn thinks he has every right not to say goodbye. If anything, they should be thanking him for holding in the vomit he feels anytime he’s in the same vicinity as them.

But, Zayn is and will always be seen as the bad guy, Liam clearly unable to move on from their relationship. And yes, Zayn knows he’s the one who’s single and constantly mad, but that’s only because he knows Liam is mad. Zayn doesn’t need to be in a relationship to prove he has moved on, nor does he hold any resentment towards Liam for how things ended. Okay, sure he’s angry at some things, but that’s in the past and doesn't affect his future. Liam, on the other hand, holds the past in his fucking palm and never lets Zayn forget. It’s amazing how they can still stay civil towards one another in the presence of their daughter. Liam and Zayn both at the line of cracking, but never completely, in front of her. She thinks they’re friends, she thinks they’re okay, and as long as she thinks that, they’ll get along.

 

“How was swimming?” Zayn asks once Mia is in the car, driving down to Soho for their dinner reservation.

“It’s good, Aaron is helping me with my backstroke,” She says casually, no idea how each word is a stab to his heart.

“Sounds like fun.” Zayn says, hoping the topic is now closed.

“Maybe one day I can teach you how to swim,” Mia says happily and Zayn has ‘no’ at the tip of his tongue, but he holds himself. His twelve year old daughter looking too happy to be let down.

Zayn looks over and smiles, “Maybe.”

She squints her eyes towards him, “you lie.”

Zayn focuses between the road and his daughter, “I’m offended you’d say that to me.”

She folds her arms and crooks her eyebrow, “Dad told me he tried to teach you to swim once and you gave up instantly.”

“Your father lies.”

Mia laughs his comment off, “whatever you say, Baba.”

 

They arrive at their dinner reservation fifteen minutes late. Zayn twitches for time to stop, so he can catch up. Though he knows that’s impossible, so he locks away his phone and watch, never checking the time and places all of his attention on Mia and what’s new in her life.

"I really want a phone for my birthday," Mia whines as the waiter serves them their food.

Zayn ignores her cries and leans over the table to grab some of her honey chicken, "Sometimes you want what you can't have." Zayn shrugs.

Mia sticks her tongue out and grabs her plate, "you're banned from eating my food."

Zayn swallows his food and squints, "Meany," he teases.

"I'm the one without a phone here, Baba."

"You're twelve, it's unnecessary."

"All my friends have one," she says with her mouth full.

Zayn makes a disgusted face at her (joking of course), "if your friends jumped off a mountain, would you?"

Mia shrugs, "Maybe if Lucas did."

Zayn points his chop sticks towards her, "You and Lucas need to chill."

"He's my best friend, wouldn't you do that for yours?" Mia asks, confused why Zayn doesn't like her and Lucas being close. He's just protective. To them, their friendship is normal, regardless of the sex. Zayn needs to remember that Lucas is his best mates son, and Harry and Louis raised an amazing child who Mia can be around.

"I would," Zayn replies.

Mia smiles and leans over to eat his spring rolls, "So," She begins, "Do they have Chinese restaurants in Paris?"

 

Mia spends the weekend with Zayn. They finish off their Marvel Movie Marathon, have dinner with Harry and his family. They spend Sunday with Zayns family, Mia rarely seeing her cousins, since Zayns sister moved to Bradford after she got married.

He drops her home after, an ache in his heart, wishing she could live with him full time.

"Can't I stay one more night, baba," Mia begs. "Please, I never see you." She's looking him straight in the eye, her lips carrying a pout and eyes pooling with tears.

Zayn holds her close, "I wish, sweetie."

It's not that he can't keep her for another night, or the rest of the week, even. But after Zayns return, he and Liam came to an agreement, he would have her weekends and school holidays and Liam would have her every other. It's hard, however, it's a routine that works. Zayn hates arguing with Liam, not because he hates to see him mad, he hates having to deal with him and his complaints.  So he sucks it up, and cuddles Mia closer as she cries in his arms, the goodbyes always hard.

Zayn thinks he knows why she's always sad to leave, even though he lives less than fifteen minutes away. He doesn't talk about it though, leaves the space empty in fear of triggering his own conscious. He also thinks he's a coward, scared to hear how his departure has fucked with his daughter. He's fearful a piece of her will never be able to let it go. (And she shouldn't have to.) But, Zayn doesn't know how to manage the situation, so this is what he deals with it, in fear of anything else.

"Maybe sometime this week, I'll pick you up and we'll go movies?" He suggests.

Mia lets go and wipes her eyes, "Really?" she asks.

Zayn smiles and wipes her cheeks, they're red and wet from her crying. "Yes, I'll even leave work early and pick you up from school."

Her face breaks into a massive grin, teeth showing and light returning to her eyes. "I'd love that, Baba." She hugs him tightly and kisses him goodbye.

Zayn moves up from his crouching position and watches her hug Liam then go inside. Liam is staring eyebrows scrunched and arms folded.

"What?" Zayn asks harshly.

Liam scoffs and shakes his head, "I shouldn't have to tell you."

"Okay, well we're not together anymore and I can't read minds," Zayn notes.

"She never cries when she has to leave me," Liam points out.

Zayn composes himself, not showing any sort of emotion towards Liam. "You see her more."

Liam massages his temples, "fuck," he groans, "you're a twat."

Zayn strides forward, "fuck you," he spits out. "I don't have to justify how our relationship works. Butt out." Zayn turns and walks away, he won't allow Liam to slitter his way under his skin with his words or passive-aggressive looks.

**  
**

 Zayn arrives to Mia's birthday party at exactly 7pm. He's the first one there-- always on time. He hates that trait about himself, only because it means he's forced to be around longer.

Liam answers the doors, all smiles until he sees his face. "Hi," he says dryly.

"Hi," Zayn replies, tone just as dull.

They stand at the door awkwardly, neither wanting to continue a conversation. Aaron suddenly appears and smiles brightly, "Zayn, come in," he says cheerfully. Zayn smiles and enters, looking around the decked out house. The theme is 80s. There is different balloon colours scattered around, a disco ball hanging off the ceiling and a massive table filled with food. Very sweet, he admits.

"The place looks nice," Zayn comments.

Aaron speaks on behalf of them, "took us a whole day."

Zayn nods once and gestures towards the stairs, "I'm gonna say hello to Mia."

Liam and Aaron nod before turning to whisper something to one another. Zayn rolls his eyes, glad he didn't eat before he came or he'd be vomiting on their tiled floor.

Zayn knocks on his daughters door and opens it slightly, "is the birthday girl in here?"

He sees Mia lying on her bed, face in the pillows. "What's wrong, sweetie?" Zayn moves towards his daughter, placing a hesitant hand on her back. She looks up, her face blotchy from the tears she's evidently cried.

"Mia..." He softly says, "What happened, baby?"

She begins to cry again, leaning forward so she can wrap her arms around his waist. Zayn holds her tight, letting her sob into his chest.

Once she's calmed down and pulled away, he wipes the few tears spilling from her tanned face and asks, "Ready to talk?"

She pouts and looks away, "it's embarrassing'," she rasps.

"Hey, don't ever feel embarrassed in front of me; you know you can tell me anything." Zayn speaks honestly, voice intent on showing his daughter how seriously he's taking this.

She sighs and bites her bottom lip; they're full like her fathers. "Oh my god, Baba, I can't do this."

"Do what?" Zayn asks confused.

"Tell you this, it's like... weird."

"I did birth you, so whatever is going on, I'm automatically going to understand."

She sighs and nods her head once, exhaling in and out before whispering, "I got my periods."

Zayn stops every bone within his body from showing how ecstatic and proud he is that his daughter got her periods. She seems to take his silence as something else, because, suddenly she's crying again.

"Oh, no, no, baby." Zayn is hugging his daughter, cradling her as she sobs. "I'm so proud and happy right now, you have nothing to be embarrassed about. This is you entering women hood." Zayn reassures.

She pulls back, crying having stopped. "It's disgusting and if you tell anyone, I'll never talk to you again."

"I'm not going to tell anyone," Zayn smiles, "but when your dad finds out he'll be over the moon too.

"Find out what?" Liam unexpectedly says, walking into her bedroom, concern written on his face.

Mia groans and flops face first into her pillow. Zayn pats her back before getting up to stand face to face with Liam.

"Mia got her first periods," Zayn softly says, trying hard not dance around with cheerfulness. Liam doesn't seem to care because he's suddenly all wide smiles, clapping and jumping on her bed. "My baby, I'm so happy for you." He applauses.

Mia gets up, face flushed and angry. "I hate you."

Liam stops jumping and squats on her level, saying, "I love you."

She wipes her wet eyes and smiles, "love you too, dad,"

Zayn watches from afar as his daughter and the man he thought was the love of his life share a moment. He suddenly feels too small for the room and before he can sneak out, Mia looks up and smiles wide, "Sorry for my outburst before, baba."

Zayn comes forward and places his hand on her shoulder, "this is our little secret and our reactions were quite normal for parents."

Liam nods along, actually agreeing with what Zayn has to say. "Can I tell Aaron? He'll be happy too." Liam asks.

Zayn wants to scream out no but before he can say anything, Mia is shrugging and whispering, "Okay." Liam smiles proudly and Zayn wants to punch him in the face.

"Mia," they hear Aaron call out. "Your friends have begun arriving."

She hops off her bed and quickly fixes her hair and makeup in the mirror. She turns to her fathers, "how do I look?"

"Beautiful," Zayn says, honoured that he can call the women in front of him, his own.

"Very pretty, baby," Liam agrees. She waves goodbye and runs out the room.

Liam's about to leave but Zayn grabs his wrist, as quickly as he touched Liam, he immediately lets go. Their touches are now foreign an unknown feeling Zayn doesn't know how to react to any longer.

"You're not serious about telling Aaron, are you?" Zayn asks.

Liam rolls his eyes, "he has a right to know."

"How?" Zayn nearly yells.

"Zayn," Liam softly says, a look of pity on his face. "C'mon, why do you constantly disregard Aaron as a parent figure in Mia's life?"

Zayn gapes out Liam, upset at his comment. "I wasn't even close to the level you're referring too. I can't believe you'd even think he has a right to be a parent figure in her life."

Liam looks angry now, "he's raised her just as much as we have, maybe even more than you."

Zayn feels the sting of his words bruise his heart. He hates how Liam brings up the past as if Zayn needs to be reminded he fucked up. It continuously haunts him and Liam doesn't need to bring it up every time they argue. "She's my fucking daughter, no other person can come into her life and take my place."

"Nobody is trying," Liam yells.

"Bullshit,"  Zayn screams. "You've tried to replace me with Aaron since I can fucking remember. She's my daughter Liam, I birthed her, I held her for 9 months. I wasn't fucking there for five years but the connection we have can't be broken. No matter how hard you try," Zayn spits out, body trembling with anger.

Liam's face softens, "it's never meant to be like that."

"And yet," Zayn hand gestures, "here we are."

"He's going to find out, anyway," Liam excuses, voice still soft.

"Not if you don't tell him," Zayn advises. "You really don't understand how shit he makes me feel, do you?" His voice is sad now. Zayn hates that he's become this open in front of Liam. Liam has no right to see this side of him, the insecure, vulnerable side. (Stopped seeing this side when he couldn't even understand Zayn when they were together.)

"What do you want me to say?" Liam asks.

"Nothing," Zayn sighs, "you've never known what to say to me, how to make me feel better, I don't expect it now when we hate each other."

Liam's face scrunches up, "I don't hate you."

"Funny," Zayn snorts, angry and hurt, "I hate you." He walks away before Liam can reply. He tells himself that's why. But really, he doesn't want to see Liam's reaction, fearful he hurt him, more scared that his words didn't.

 

The party is in full swing by 8.30. Everyone finally arrived, including Harry and Louis.  All three are sitting together at a deserted table, not socialising with anyone, since most guests are young teenagers and the other half is Liam and Aaron acquaintances.

"I'm so angry that the idea of even telling Aaron crossed his mind," Zayn bitches to Harry and Louis. Still upset over the fight they had.

Harry is holding his three year old daughter, cradling her as she continues to cry from being over tired. "You just told us she got her periods," he states.

Zayn glares over at Harry, his comments not needed in a time like this. "This is different and I've only told you because I know Liam is going to tell Aaron," Zayn maintains.

"Aaron's nice. Whenever he drops Mia off, he always stays for a quick chat." Louis adds. Zayn looks between his two supposedly best friends in disgust. Appalled at how badly they're making him feel. "I'm confused on how I'm friends with either of you right now."

Harry pouts and leans over to touch Zayns shoulder, "Liam would never let a person into Mia's life who he didn't think was worthy. Be happy he doesn't treat her like shit."

Zayn sighs and slumps into his seat. He spots his daughter in the middle of the dance floor, dancing to ABBA. Her smile is wide, hair all over the place. She's happy and Zayn will be content with life as long as she's okay. "I just," Zayn stops himself from confessing his feelings, although Harry and Louis are no stranger to them. "I missed years of her life and I hate myself for it, so I'm making up for it persistently and I feel as if Aaron was there on the important moments I missed." Zayn says sadly, wishing he didn't have this constant pressure on his chest of the past.

Harry wipes his eyes, "you got to move on from that Zayn, you were bloody young."

"I know," Zayn drags. He shoves Harry lightly, hoping to lighten up the mood he put a damper on. "Why are you crying, you twat."

Harry wipes his eyes and hands Hannah over to Louis. "I'm unable to control my emotions right now."

Louis cradles Hannah who's fallen asleep in his arms instantly. "She hates me," Harry sadly watches on as Louis tucks Hannah more to his chest.

Louis rolls his eyes, evidently used to Harry and his emotions. "Stop being a sook, boo." His voice isn't harsh, only filled with fondness.

"Dad," Lucas appears, panting; face red from dancing and eating too many sweets. "They're opening the presents soon and I forgot Mia's in my room," he says distressed.

Louis laughs and Harry grabs his son by the waist, pulling him in for a quick hug. "I made sure to grab it. It's on the table, son," Louis reassures.

Lucas' exhales out, stress wiped off his face. "Thank god," He says before running back off.

"He bought her a make-up set," Harry says proudly. "I think he has a crush on her," he giggles.

Zayn frowns, "can kids at this age have crushes?"

Harry and Louis both laugh, "We did," Harry grins, leaning over to peck Louis.

"You guys met when you were 16," Zayn deadpans.

"Might as well have been 13," Harry snaps, giving an evil squint.

Zayn sticks his tongue out and focuses back on the party before him. He notices Aaron walking their way and sits up straighter.

"Cakes ready!" Aaron says gleefully. Zayn gives a tight smile, "coming," he mocks in a friendly manner.

Zayn turns to Louis and Harry-- they're getting up themselves. "Take as much photos of Mia and I as you can and please, for the love of god, don't get Aaron in the photos." He rushes out. He heads over to the table where Mia is standing. He stands beside her; she looks up and smiles widely when she notices it's him. Zayns heart contracts with love and he holds her tight as she leans in for a hug.

Liam is standing on the other side of her, body tight as his arm accidentally brushes Zayns shoulder. Zayn ignores the touch, ignores the heat in the pit of his stomach and focuses on singing happy birthday to his daughter. She cuts the cake and kisses the nearest boy. (She forces Liam and Zayn to lean down to peck them both on the cheek. Zayn sees Harry pointing to his son, whose arms are crossed and lips have pouted. Zayn laughs and shakes his head.)

After the cake has been eaten and more photos have been taken, everyone stands around the gift table watching with smiles as Mia opens up her presents. She receives make-up and a new swimming costume, some art supplies (which Zayn will try to sneak for himself.) Aaron and Liam buy her a skateboard. Mia leans over the table with excitement as she hi5s Louis. "You and I will go skating one day. If your dad is up for the challenge he can come too," Louis teases, sending a wink his way.

Zayn snorts, "challenge accepted, buddy."

Mia grabs Zayns present next. She opens the envelope and takes out the piece of paper inside. She reads the ticket, "Paris. 1st august. 2015." She looks up, tears prickle her eyes, "Baba," she says in awe. She jumps into his arms, wrapping her arms and legs around his lean body. "Thank you, thank you, thank you," she's squeals. Zayn is laughing as he puts her down. He wipes her long hair away from her face, "you're welcome, babe."

Mia shows Liam, still jumping up and down, squealing. Liam takes the ticket and reads over it. "This is awesome," He says, his voice playing the perfect part of a supportive father. If only everyone knew how many emails were exchanged between them, Zayn trying to convince Liam to let her go. In the end, Liam caved after one heated phone call that lasted three minutes. Zayn not letting Liam win the round.

There was one more box left and Mia grabs it, looking up to Aaron, confused.  "Open it," he insists.

Mia rips open the wrapping paper and shrieks. Zayn and Liam look over her shoulder, both their heads looking up in sync to stare at Aaron. Zayn with anger, Liam with disbelief.

" _Oh my god,_ " Mia says. "I love you," she yells with excitement. She barges past Liam to hug Aaron.

Liam is scratching the back of his neck, Zayn is glaring at him, eyes piercing the side of his face. Liam looks up slightly, features filled with shame. He's about to say something but is interrupted by Mia hugging him tightly.

"Thanks dad," she says to the both of them.

Zayn gives a tight smile. Liam has already disappeared before Zayn can take him aside. He notices Aaron is missing too.

Zayn places his hand out, "can I have this for a moment, please."

Mia pouts but reluctantly hands the box over.

Zayn marches off in search of Liam. He finds them in the kitchen, loud whispers escaping their angry mouths.

"I told you we didn't want to get her a phone until she's older, Aaron," Liam says frustrated.

"You and Zayn spoke about that and left me out," Aaron says.

Zayn rolls his eyes, the audacity Aaron thinks he has. Zayn walk in and slams the iPhone box on the kitchen bench.

"Fuck you," Zayn spits.

Liam jumps at his sudden appearance and sighs, "Zayn, please."

"I cannot believe you got her an iPhone, Aaron," Zayn says with a disappointed tone.

"Don't start, Zayn."

"Guys, cannot we not do this here, right now?" Liam questions, eyes pleading with them both.

"When would be the appropriate time to bring up Aaron acting like he has a say in our daughters life?"

"I've been more of a father then you have," Aaron spits.

"Aaron!" Liam shouts.

Zayn stands there frozen, unable to move his numb, broken body. He wants to disappear but can't. Aaron seems to have left the room and all that's left is Zayn, Liam, and a space words cannot even touch.

"Zayn..." Liam hesitates, placing a soft hand on his tense shoulder.

Zayn pushes him off and steps back, still unable to speak. What's left to say? He's a bad father, and nothing he does will ever make up for what happened in the past.

“You’re lucky I don’t punch him in the face,” Zayn spits. The only words he wants to say are words that can conflict pain on Liam.

“He was out of order, I know you’re angry.” Liam reassures. His words don’t make Zayn feel any better. They’re just fillers, common words to say, but never actually helping. It's always  been that way, ever since their first fight when they were seventeen. Zayn accepted that Liam could never make him feel better when he was upset, put that past him because the love he held, overpowered the frustration.

“Ugh,” Zayn groans. “How could you allow him to get her a fucking mobile phone.” He changes the subject, anger replacing a love that doesn't exist anymore.

“I didn't know he was buying her one,” Liam confronts. “Why are you blaming me?”

"Because that's your partner in there, intruding on my daughter’s life." Zayn snaps.

Liam slumps against the kitchen bench, his body showing signs of exhaustion. "I don't want to argue anymore." Liam begins, "Aaron fucked up, I'll speak with him and explain the boundaries, okay?"

Zayn gapes at his ex-husband. Liam has never given in so easy when it concerns him, always defending Aaron's honour that has caused them to not speak for long periods of time.

"Okay..." Zayn says slightly shocked and unaware on what else to say.

"Let's go enjoy the rest of our daughter’s birthday?" Liam says, pushing himself off the bench and walking over to pat his back. This time Zayn doesn't push Liam away, his hand like fire burning his skin. Zayn prays his body isn't conveying how hot he's suddenly feeling.

"I'll meet you outside," Zayn mumbles. He walks over to the fridge and sculls a bottle of cold water.

 

 

"He touched me when nobody else was there, Harry." Zayn punctuates to his friend over the phone. Its 1am in the morning and Zayn can't sleep, to buzzed over Liam's touch and his soft tone and how he was on Zayns side for once. It never has happened before.

" _Character development,_ " Harry yawns.

Zayn stops biting his nails, aware that's he's keeping Harry awake for stupid ex-husband drama that doesn't affect him at all. "I still hate him," Zayn states, "I just felt like it was a nice gesture."

" _Maybe you guys can be friends now_ ," Harry is speaking softer, Zayn knows he's about to pass out.

"Haz, go sleep, I'll see you in three days."

Harry mumbles a goodbye, hanging up. Zayns nerves still feels on fire, he can't keep still, mind jumbling with all these thoughts and ideas and memories and wow. Zayn stops moving to inhale and exhale. "Chill," he whispers out loud.

He has an early flight to Berlin in the morning, hence why Mia didn't bother staying the night. He checks his luggage and passport, anything he can do to distract himself from Liam and that bloody touch.

He hears his phone beep and sees a message from Liam. His heart leaps just a tiny bit and Zayn hates himself for it.

**Contact Mia. This is Mia's mobile number**

Zayn replies instantly. ** _-thanks, is she happy with it?_**

**Yeah. she's using my iTunes account to download apps**

_**-Make sure she doesn't download any dating apps** _

**Lol already on that** **....**

**Y are you awake?**

Zayn bites his lip, this is where he can stop their easy conversation or continue. Usually he wouldn't reply, however, Liam has never been like this, so he's never been in this situation before. Zayn decides to reply, it's not like he has anything better to do.

_**Can't sleep... Wbu?** _

**The couch is uncomfortable**

Zayn tries to push down the feeling of Liam unable to sleep and thinking of Zayn enough to message him in early hours of the morning.

_**Aaron angry at you?** _

Zayn is annoyed on Liam's behalf, the idea of Aaron being slightly mad for ultimately, being in the wrong is bullshit, He thinks.

**Something like that ..**

Zayn's about to reply when he receives another text.

**Going to bed, night..have a safe flight**

Zayn texts back goodnight and falls into bed, the memory of his first encounter with Liam playing in his head like a lullaby helping him sleep.

  


Zayn hasn't gone through security check when he feels a long vibration against his thigh. He sees he has 10 text messages, 4 missed calls and 2 voice mails-- all from Liam. He bites his lip, wondering what he could have done. He turns his phone back onto airplane mode, thinking nothing of it. (Also, the fact that he feels nervous makes him want to leave his phone on airplane mode forever.)

Once he's gone through claims and collected his luggage, he goes to the car waiting for him. Brian drives him everywhere (when he isn’t driving himself.) It's always great to see Brian.

"How was Berlin?" He asks, taking the luggage off Zayn.

"Good, glad to be home, though."

Brian nods his head and heads for the front door. Once Zayn is comfortably sitting down, he turns his off airplane mode and reads all the messages he has. Liam's angry , although Zayn isn't sure why. All that's in the texts are swear words and explanation marks.

He doesn't bother listening to the voice messages left and calls Liam instead.

" _Where the fuck have you been?"_ Is the first words Zayn hears after two rings.

He’s confused. "I just got off the plane."

" _Weren't you meant to land yesterday?_ " Liam questions.

"Yes, but changed my flight to today because of work," Zayn replies a little too fast, unaware why he feels the need to defend himself and reassure Liam.

 _"You could've have messaged me, called me or even emailed me so I know to change my plans and pick up our daughter, so she's not all alone at home!_ " Liam yells.

Zayn is really fucking confused. "What the fuck," he says. "I spoke with Mia yesterday and explained the situation and she said she'd tell you."

_"I obviously didn't get the memo when Aaron and I were two hours away and I had to get Harry to pick her up so she wasn't alone at home because her father can't be responsible," Liam rants, "but I'm not surprised, seems you haven't changed at all."_

Zayn wasn't angry, but now he is. "Do you have to bring up the past every single time we argue just to justify your anger towards me?" Zayn asks but it wasn't a question, more so a statement. He continues, "if anything I should be angry that you didn't wait until Mia was with me before taking a romantic getaway to fuck knows where."

 _"Zayn,"_ Liam groans.

"Where is she now?"

_"Aaron has gone to pick her up from Harry's."_

"Okay, get him to drop her at mine after," Zayn says, thinking their argument was pushed aside and forgotten.

He hears Liam snort, _"She’s not going to yours this week. Right now, I don't trust you."_

Zayn feels like he's been slapped in the face and left beaten raw. "What," he undertones.

Liam sighs, _"I'd just feel more comfortable if she stayed with me."_

"Fuck off, you twat, see you in an hour with my daughter ready to go home with me." Zayn hangs up before Liam can respond.

 

When he arrives to Liam's house, Zayn tells Brian to wait and stalks over to the door. He doesn't bother knocking and barges in. Liam's pacing the front foyer, he stops when he hears Zayn enter.

"Where's Mia?" Zayn demands.                           

"Aaron is still picking her up."

"Bullshit," Zayn spits. "I bet you told him to take her for ice cream or swimming lessons."

"You're so fucking dramatic," Liam growls.

"You're the one that is banning me from having my daughter," Zayn yells, appalled by Liam.

"You left her alone!" Liam yells, hands raised. Zayn ignores his comment and leaps for the phone in his hand.

"Zayn," Liam grunts, "get off me."

Zayn doesn't listen, he just fights for the strong hold Liam has on his phone. "Give me the phone." Zayn demands.

"No," Liam shouts. He's trying to push Zayn away, his open palm pressed against his chest. Liam's other hand held high with Zayns fingers trying to retrieve the device.

"You're fucking mental," Liam pants, changing his position. He moves his right leg to wrap around Zayns ankle. Zayn tries to remove his leg but before he can, they're both tumbling to the ground. Liam's chest blocking his airways.

Zayn takes his free hand and twists Liam's nipple. "Ouch," he hisses. Liam pockets his phone and swiftly adjusts his body so his legs are on either side of his waist. He has Zayns wrists held down, above his head. They're both panting and glaring at each other.

"Are you calm yet?" Liam asks, slowly letting go of Zayn. He's still on top of him, though and this could come off sexual if it weren't for the fact that it's anything but.

Zayn doesn't move his hands from above his head. Liam is making no move to remove his body off him. Zayn gazes at Liam, still panting from the wrestle match they had.

"Lia-," he's suddenly cut off by Liam's lips pressed against his own. Zayn freezes, unprepared for this sudden shift of anger.

Liam pulls back and Zayn feels the loss of his warm lips. He leans forward and presses their mouths back together. It's hard and rough, their tongues twirling for dominance. Zayn puts his hands in Liam's hair, pulling the short curls along his neck. Liam grinds his hips against Zayn, making him moan out. This encourages Liam to keep moving, thrusting his hips faster. Zayns dick swells up and he can feel Liam’s against his own.

"Fuck," he groans. They're humping one another as if they were teenagers again.

Liam presses kisses along his jaw line, down to his neck and bites into the soft flesh. It's painful but the pleasure against his dick helps him ignore the ache. Liam is moaning around his lobe now, pulling the section between his teeth.

"Close," he pants, mouth hot against his ear.

"Same," Zayn agrees, pushing his hips forward to meet Liam's thrusts.

He can't believe they're about to come in their pants, neither repositioning their hands to help each other get off faster.

Liam presses another harsh kiss to his mouth, and Zayn feels his balls tighten, a shiver run down his spine before he's coming in his pants like a 15 year old.

Liam's not far behind, Zayn can feel him shake above him, his thighs tensing as he comes in his pants.

Liam hops off Zayn and lies beside him, they're both breathless and looking up at the ceiling. After the glow has worn off, regret seeps into Zayns body. He fucked up, and the disgust has settled into his regretful thoughts.

He sits up, running fingers through his messy hair. "That was a mistake," Zayn gets straight to the point.  He's never been one to shy away from being honest.

Liam doesn't answer straight away, and Zayns scared to turn around. "I agree," he finally acknowledges.

Zayn nods his head once and pushes himself up to his feet. They're weak, along with his whole body. He didn't get fucked but it feels like it.

"How long until Mia is home?" Zayn asks causally, fixing himself up.

Liam coughs, "um, soon. I, um, think."

"Cool," Zayn says uneasily moving around, trying to distract himself from the tension between them.

Finally, after what feels like forever, Mia and Aaron walk through the door.

"Baba!" Mia runs over and hugs him. Zayn feels revolted with himself. He's got come in his pants and his daughter is touching him after he's just fucked around with her father.

He hugs her back nonetheless. "You're in trouble, missy," Zayn says after letting go. She gives him a confused look, "why?"

"I told you I couldn't make it yesterday and asked you tell your father to pick you up, why didn't you tell him?"

Mia looks down to her feet, "I'm sorry," she mumbles. "I thought they wouldn't have left yet so I got uncle Harry to drop me home and when I got here Dad was gone and I didn't want to call him because he would have yelled at me for not telling him earlier and I tried to call you but your phone was off." She rambles.

Zayn hears Aaron scoff and whisper "typical." Under his breath. Zayn looks up and glares, eyes focusing on Liam's arm wrapped around Aarons waist. He feels hurt, however, he doesn't linger, focusing back on his daughter.

"That's no excuse Mia, you had your father worried sick." Zayn doesn't include the fact, that she had her father abusive towards him. "Also, something could've happened to you, and we wouldn't have known."

Mia nods her head, "I understand, I'm sorry."

Zayn sighs and brings her in for another hug, "I love you."

"Love you too, baba."

"Mia, I'm disappointed. The reason you have a phone is so you can contact us," Liam speaks out of nowhere. Zayn tries his hardest not to rolls his eyes.

"I know, dad," Mia drags.

"Go upstairs and pack what you need to stay with Baba."

Zayn locks eyes with Liam for a split second. He nods his head in gratitude.

Liam's has let go of Aaron at this point and they're all standing in a large circle.

Once Mia has left, Zayn speaks, "I expect an apology from you, but I know I won't get one." Liam rolls his eyes, Zayn continues. "I blame Aaron, since he was the one who decided to get her a phone. "

"Don't blame me for this," Aaron interrupts.

Zayn raises his hand to silence him, "I'm speaking now." He glares at both men standing in front of him, sick of taking their shit and feeling inadequate around them.

"I'm confiscating her phone while she's with me. If you need to contact her, call my phone and if you have a problem with her punishment, I don't give a shit." Zayn concludes. He folds his arms and looks between the two men. "Questions?"

"I'll punish her when she returns home." Liam says.

"What's her punishment going to be?"

"We haven't decided yet." Aaron speaks up.

"Are you Liam?" Zayn cocks his head to the side with a fake, confused expression on his face.

"I don't know how Liam ever married you." Aaron spits in irritation before stalking off.

Zayn laughs a little, remembering how he and Liam just dry humped where he was standing.

"You're honestly a dick sometimes, Zayn," Liam shakes his head, walking off. Everything that happened between them, now disappeared.

"Mia," Zayn yells. "What is taking you so long?"

"I can't find my make-up bag," she yells back.

Zayn scrunches his face up, "why do you need make up?" He asks confused.

"Because I do!" She shouts, unamused by his question.

"Chill, Liam," Zayn mocks. His daughter unquestionably getting the hulk side from her father’s genes.

 

It's been a week since Zayn came in his pants because of his ex-husband. To say he's forgotten, would be a lie. The memory is a broken record, playing in his mind over and over. He's been on edge, unable to think properly or concentrate on work. He looks in the mirror with disgust, can't believe he let himself fall back into Liam's trap.

Zayn doesn't know what he was thinking. Knows he wasn't thinking. He was angry and Liam was the cause of it. It felt good to let out the steam. Kiss him harshly, pull his hair and make it painful.

Their kisses were once soft, delicate. Their touches were never ruff but kind. This thing that happened with he and Liam was new, but it meant nothing.

Zayn lost his virginity to Liam. They were young, dumb and in love. The cliché thing that all teenagers will experience in their life. Six months later, he was pregnant with their child. His whole world had fallen apart, every dream he dreamt, washed away by the specimen in his stomach growing more and more every day. Every hope, crumbling before him. Liam never understood the pressure Zayn felt. He whispered reassuring words into his skin at night, kissed his belly perfectly and held him as he cried, but. He never listened, never grasped how broken Zayn was.

Zayn doesn't regret having his daughter. He does regret his decision to leave her when she was four years old, to find himself. It haunts him everyday how he handled the situation. He lost five years of her life he can never gain back. He followed his dreams and lost a family for it. He tries to repair the broken pieces within himself, but he can't. It doesn't help when Liam discourages his progress. He makes him feel shit, when it was Liam who wanted this life not Zayn.

The past happened, Zayn accepts it.

He's knocked out of his train of thought when he hears a knock at the door. Zayn looks at the time-- half past 4. He's meant to pick Mia up from Harry's after dinner, and he's not expecting anyone today.

He opens the door and is not surprised to see Liam standing there. He's wearing jeans and a black jumper, his white Nike shoes look freshly clean. He looks newly shaven too, hair combed back.

"Hi," Liam says awkwardly, hands in his pockets, face looking distressed.

"Um, hi," Zayn says, body leaning against the open door.

"Can I come in?" Liam asks.

"For what?" Zayn questions.

Liam groans in frustration, "I need to speak with you."

"I'm working right now and you never told me you were coming past."

Liam huffs, "wow, could you be anymore controlling?"

"I'm not controlling," Zayn snaps. He hates that word. It was one of the constant words Liam used when they fought.

"Well," Liam removes his hand from his pocket and opens up his palm, "are you gonna be a dick or let me in."

"Be a dick." Zayn goes to slam the door in his face but Liam places his foot between the gap and pushes his hand against the wood.

"You're fucking joking, right?"

"I'm working."

"Please," Liam pleads.

Zayn sighs, reluctantly letting go of the door and allowing Liam into his home.

"What did you want?" Zayn asks, leaving no room for Liam to get comfortable. He's looking around the house, never having been in here before.

"Nice home you have," Liam says, eyes glancing into the kitchen.

"Thanks," Zayn deadpans. "What do you want?"

"Aaron got a job offer," Liam reveals.

"Wow, amazing, congrats, When's the party?" Zayn dryly says.

Liam ignores his comment and sticks his finger up. "It's in Liverpool."

Zayn doesn't know where Liam is going with this conversation but it better not be what he thinks. He waves his hand as a gesture for him to continue.

"We've spoken about it, and he's going to take it.," Liam mumbles, like he's afraid to say it any louder.

Zayn plays along, "great, the less I see of you two, the better. I'll make sure Mia gets dropped safely to your house on the weekends."

"I-," Liam says speechless. "Zayn... Aaron, me and Mia are moving."

"Over my dead body," Zayn quickly snaps. "No fucking way are you taking her with you."

"I knew you would react this way." Liam argues.

"How else do you expect me to react when you wanna take my daughter from me," Zayn demands, utterly outraged.

Liam walks forward, finger poking his chest. "Be happy for us.

Zayn slaps his hand away and pokes him right back, "don't touch me."

Liam looks up and down from his face to chest, poking him again. "Don't touch me."

Zayn glares and grabs his finger, "you touched me first," he snarls.

They're both glaring at one another, faces flushed and body's shaking with clear anger. Zayns still holding Liam's finger. Their breathing has picked up too and Zayns body is now pressed to the wall. He licks his lips and before he knows it, they both move forward, mouths meeting harshly in the middle.

The kiss is all teeth and tongue, anything but nice. Liam's pushes Zayn roughly against the wall, rutting against his leg, cock already hard and thick, pressing into him. Zayns cock thickens too, body moving forward to meet with Liam.

Liam moves back-- Zayns about to protest but Liam's latched his mouth alongside his collarbone, sucking a harsh bruise into his sensitive skin. Zayn tries to hold his moan, pleasure oozing into his body and making him a fool at Liam's unrequested command.

"Do you want to take this somewhere else?" Liam pants between a kiss.

Zayn nods, afraid to speak. He shoves Liam away and watches him stumble backwards. Zayn moves forward and crashes their mouths together, biting Liams bottom lip before pulling apart again. He grabs Liam's hand and pulls him towards the stairs.

Once they're in his bedroom, Liam quickly scans his surroundings, then he pushes Zayn onto the mattress and crawls on top of him. Their kisses are more intense, no space for air, just twists of tongues and loud sounds being swallowed.

Zayn pulls back and bites Liam's jaw, "are we doing this?"

Liam's breathing hard, "only if you want."

Zayn stares into Liam's brown eyes, the light adding a tinge of colour into them. They're soft but not open. They're nervous, but not afraid.

This is where Zayn can say no. This is where he can pull away and lock Liam out. This is what it's come down to, and Zayn realizes he wants to be fucked by the person he hates the most. It's ironic and he's clearly unstable, but, fuck it.

"Fuck me," Zayn demands.

Within a blink of an eye Liam removes both their clothes, leaving them naked, cocks heavy to rub against one another. Liam bites his neck, down to his stomach and back up. His mouth latches on every inch of his exposed skin. Liam is teasing, and Zayn has no time for that. He grabs his jaw and pulls him from in between his thighs, "You gonna fuck me or what?"

Liam ignores his question and leans down to shove his tongue into his mouth, Zayn moaning and sucking him in, swallowing the sounds vibrating against their lips.

Zayn moves his face away, hand looking for his side draw to grab a condom and lube. Once he finds them, he throws the objects at Liam's chest.

Liam takes the objects and places them beside him. Then he man handles Zayn and flips him over, so his stomach is pressed down onto the mattress and his arse is up. Zayn groans and arches his arse back, needy for some fingers. Liam strokes a wet finger down his hole, teasing the tip before finally, he pushes in.

"Fuck," Zayn keens, "more."

Liam dribbles lube on his hole before placing another digit alongside his other one. His fingers are thick and long, hitting his prostate perfectly.

Zayn is fucking down on his hand, impatient and wanting more. "Uh huh," he wails when Liam is three fingers deep, hitting his spot, "right. there," he chokes.

"Fuck," Liam pants, first time speaking since he started to fuck him. "You ready?" He asks.

Zayn hisses yes. Liam removes his fingers and harshly places his hands on Zayns waist, pulling his body up so he's positioned on his hands and knees.

Liam shoves his cock in him slowly. Zayn hasn't had Liam in him since he was 21 but the feeling is still the same. He always filled him up perfectly, his cock just the right thickness and length to fuck him-- so fucking good.

Liam is thrusting in him at a nice pace, but Zayn doesn't want that. He wants it to sting, he wants to sit down and have his arse ache tomorrow. "Is that all you got?" He taunts.

Liam grunts and pulls back, only to shove his cock back in ruthlessly. Zayn loses balance and ends up with only his arse up for Liam to take.

"C'mon, Liam," Zayn groans, "Give it to me."

"Fucking shut up, Zayn." Liam pants. He pulls out and Zayns about to protest but Liam has him turned over, face to face. Liam bends Zayn in half, his thighs pressing into his chest, legs over Liam's shoulder.

" _Take it,_ " Liam grunts, leaning down to give him a messy kiss. Zayn can't really do anything now but take it. Liam fucking him hard-- wonderfully. Zayn is being loud, his prostate getting the right  amount of stimulation in this position.

Liam is sweating, some of it dropping on Zayns burning skin.

Zayn scratches Liams back, his nails digging into the soft skin. He leans forward to bite along Liam's collarbone, biting the flesh and loving the sound it brings out of him.

They're both practically close. Liam losing his consistency and Zayn feeling the tingles arise from his toes, down into his stomach.

Zayn strokes his hard cock, matching Liam's rhythm. "Close," He moans.

Liam draws back then shoves back into his hole harshly, balls deep and hips twisting, without leaving his arse. Zayn shivers his toes curling as his balls tighten and body stills, come spilling out and landing on his and Liam's stomach.

He lays there, unable to move, body blissfully content. Liam comes not long after, body pliant, after he's spilled into the condom. Moments pass before Liam realizes their position, he rolls over and places an arm over his eyes, body loose and mouth wide open, still panting.

Zayns the first out of bed, he goes to the en-suite to clean up, ridding himself of Liam's salvia and sweat and fuck.

When he returns, Liam is dressed and on his phone. Zayn coughs to make himself known. Liam jumps and turns around, Zayn can see small bruises already forming on his pale skin. He doesn't care how Liam will cover those up, it's not his problem.

"This can't happen again." Zayn announces.

"I agree."

"Mia isn't moving with you to Liverpool." Zayn asserts.

"Not your decision," Liam states.

"Neither is it yours," Zayn points out.

"We'll let her decide." Liam suggests. He's putting his shoes back on and avoiding eye contact. Good, Zayn thinks.

"She's 13, how are you going to put her in that position?"

"I don't know," Liam snaps. Zayn jumps back, unprepared for the outburst. It didn't sound angry, just stressed. Liam sits on the bed and massages his temples. "No matter what, someone ends up unhappy."

Zayn scoffs, "it won't be me. Mia stays and if you fight me on this, I'll take you to court for full custody."

Liam gets up and faces Zayn with a snarl on his face, "don't push me, Zayn."

"Get out." Zayn demands. He can't have a fight after they've just fucked. He's confused enough and this anger won't help his emotions.

Liam doesn't say goodbye, he just picks up his discarded items and storms out. Zayn lays on his bed and if he cries a tiny bit, only he will know.  

**  
**

Zayn is late to pick up Mia. He's never late, ever. 'I'm so sorry." he apologises over and over to Harry, "I was working and didn't realize the time," he lies.

Harry laughs, "don't worry, Mia is always welcome to stay. Lucas loves her."

Zayn glares at Harry's sneaky comment, "a bit too much." He mutters.

Harry pushes him lightly and if he weren't pregnant, Zayn would do the same. "Bring Lucas over tomorrow if you'd like. They can hang at mine."

Harry smiles and hands over Mia's bag. "Thanks, I'll give you a call."

"Mia," Harry calls, "your dad is here."

"Coming," she replies.

"Zayn," Harry quirks his eye brow, "what's that?" He presses his thumb into the bruise Liam left. Zayn hisses, "nothing." He covers it with his hand.

"Louis!" Harry yells, "Zayn got some."

"Shh," Zayn hisses, "Mia could hear."

"She won't. Now, who is he and why am I finding out now?"

Zayn rolls his eyes, Harry always telling him to have random hook ups if he isn't going to bother for a long term relationship. "He's no one and it happened a few days ago."

"Looks fresh," Harry hums.

"You have too much time on your hands." Zayn says.

"Hey Baba," Mia suddenly appears, Lucas beside her. "Ready?"

Zayn nods and thanks the Tomlinson house once again before leaving. He Ignores Harry's wiggling eyebrows. "We'll talk soon." Harry waves, evil smirk appearing on his lips.

 

"Have fun?" Zayn asks once they're driving home.

"Yup, but I wish I could still sleep over, Lucas is my best friend." She says sadly.

Zayn bites his lip, and thinks of what a response. Lucas and Mia always had sleepovers, but as they grew older and hit puberty, Liam and Zayn both agreed their sleepovers should stop. They were once teenagers too.

"He can sleep over our house next week," Zayn suggests.

"No, you're so weird when he's over." Mia pouts and crosses her arms.

"Some families don't even let their kids hang out with different sexes," Zayn points out."At least I do."

"Yeah, yeah." She takes out her phone and plays with an app Zayn can't see properly. As long as it's not Facebook or Instagram, He isn't fussed. His baby is growing up too fast for him. He just wants to stop time and let her stay young forever.

 **  
**  


Zayn needed his oil changed. Liam is the only honest mechanic he knows. That's what he tells himself anyway, as he's pressed against the car seat, face down, arse up. Liam's got three fingers poking at his prostrate, harshly jabbing the spot over and over.

"Fuck you're tight," Liam groans, licking around his hole.

Zayn squeaks out loud, "I'm not a-- fuck." Zayn pants, "I'm not a slut like you."

Liam bites his arse cheek and removes his fingers, "the way you look now, I could say otherwise."

Zayn kicks him in the shin, "stick your cock in me and shut up."

Liam laughs and teases the tip around Zayn's red hole.

Zayn is shaking, every fibre in his body holding not to push down on the thickness he can feel. He's desperate and doesn't care how he appears. Zayn needs Liam in him, it's been three days and it's all he can think about.

Liam is his new drug and Zayn is fucking addicted.

They've had sex multiple times since their first sexual encounter. It usually starts with the topic of moving to Liverpool, but it seems neither want to talk about the issue, so they use sex as an escape, and it works. They both forget, getting lost in the pain and pleasure.

Liam has become more comfortable too, using his words and being more insistent with his hands. Zayn loves it, craves for it.

"By the end of this, you're gonna be loose." Liam grunts, body pounding into his hole. Zayn whimpers, biting his lip to stop showing how much he wants Liam to keep talking like that.

The car is a restricted space, but somehow they make it work. The windows are closed, and the air is becoming hot, steam building up in the vehicle but this isn't titanic, Zayn thinks.

Liam's hands are pressing into his waist, the bruises he left a few days ago, fading, ready for the next batch to imprinted into his skin.

Zayn turns his head as much as it allows, mouth open. Liam leans forward pressing his sweaty chest against his back, giving him an open mouth kiss. It's awkward, yet, still hot.

"I'm clean," Zayn pants suddenly.

Liam slows down his thrusts, "what," he mumbles.

"If you want to come on me, in me," Zayn rambles, "I'm clean."

Liam removes himself and flips Zayn over, eyes searching his own. His face is fixed with confusion, "Baby?" Liam asks.

"On pills."

Zayn sees Liam's face change to relief before he schools it. Liam removes the condom and lines up his cock and shoves back into him, "Okay, yeah," He pants, "I'll come in you."

Zayn closes his eyes and moans, he feels filthy, fucking his ex husband where anyone can see. He hopes they do, let them see him getting fucked, come dripping out of his arse, bruises along his body as if he was a canvas on show at Liam's own exhibition.

Zayn can feel Liam properly now and it's beautiful, his arse aching from taking so much cock in the past weeks. His body vibrates with tingles, his toes curl-- mouth open, back curving when he feels Liam come in him, Zayn automatically following straight after.

Liam pulls out and sits back, he strokes a finger up and down his abused hole, collecting the come that's dripped out and feeding it back into him. "Fuck," Liam admires out loud. "Slut," he teases and they both giggle.

They clean themselves up. Zayn waits patiently for Liam to make sure there is nothing wrong with his car. (There wasn't.)

"I hope you don't have any diseases," Zayn teases, trying to make conversation.

Liam looks up, shaking his head and wipes his forehead, some dirt sticks to his sweat."I'm clean." He huffs.

Zayn nods, "Okay, cool."

"We shouldn't have been that irresponsible, though." Liam adds. Zayn wants to ask what's responsible about the whole situation, but decides against it. He doesn't want to ruin the atmosphere, nor Liams mood.

Zayn leaves with his oil changed, a limp in his walk and feeling sexually satisfied.

 

Zayn is on a date tonight. His secretary, Andrea, had suggested he go out with her friend Robby. He'd been consistent with his no, but she pleaded that he was perfect for Zayn and what was there to lose if there was no connection. So, he agreed and now here he was, strolling London with a man who's company he was enjoying.

"Enough about me," Zayn finishes, "what about you? Any kids?"

Robby shook his head, "nope, I was engaged but found out he was cheating, so that kind of killed it all."

Zayn nodded his head, the word cheating weighing down on his thoughts. To him, he and Liam weren't cheating, because they'd been together first. That's what he told himself, anyway.

"Do you still see your ex husband?" Robby asks.

Zayn swallows a lump of salvia and shrugs, "here and there." he lies.

"Must be hard raising a kid when you're not together," Robby continued.

Zayn shrugs, "It was difficult at first, but we've both adapted to the changes."

"Well that's good then." Robby smiles and silence fills the air. It's not awkward-- surprisingly comfortable. They're walking through Piccadilly Circus when Zayn's phone begins to ring. It's Louis.

"Hey, everything okay?" Zayn asks as soon as he answers.

"Harry went into labour," Louis babbles out, "we're having another fucking baby."

Zayn halts in his steps and jumps on his tippy toes, "oh my god, oh my god, I thought he wasn't due for another few weeks?"

"I'm not a bloody doctor Zayn," Louis spits (no matter the situation, Louis never seems to fail with his sarcasm.) "Look I got to go, come to the hospital when you can."

"I will, see you soon. Give my blessings to Harry." Zayn hangs up and turns to Robby who has his hands in his pockets, looking around waiting for him to be finished.

"My friend just went into labour," Zayn says.

Robby quirks his eyebrow, "is this a ploy to end the date? Cause if you're not interested, it's okay."

Zayn shakes his head, "No, he is literally about to give birth," Zayn laughs. "Come with me to the hospital? Not the best for a date, but they've been my best mates since forever."

"You sure?"

"Yeah and after that we could grab some takeaway and head to mine?" Zayn suggests. He'd planned to have some sort of sexual interaction when he'd first laid eyes on him. Robby was lean and tall. His brown hair perfectly styled back and facial hair freshly trimmed. He was hot, and Zayn couldn't deny beauty when presented in front of him. He'd also hoped this date would distract him from Liam and their rendezvous.

They catch a taxi and arrive at the hospital twenty minutes later. He asks where the waiting room for maternity ward is and is directed to the third floor. When he enters the room, his stomach sinks, his heart quickens and his head freezes. Liam is there pacing the room, biting his nails. He stops when he notices Zayn walk in.

"Hello," Liam greets with a smile on his face, but a question behind his eyes.

"Hey," Zayn speaks slowly, his mouth forgetting how to manufacture words.

Liam stares between the two men and Zayn knows he needs to introduce them, but he can't process how to. Thankfully, Robby introduces himself. Liam shakes his hand and says, "I'm Liam."

Robby turns to Zayn with wides eyes and slight glimmer in them. He's glad he can find this amusing, since it's painful for Zayn.

"Where's the kids?" Zayn asks. The room was becoming uncomfortable and Zayn never liked uncomfortable situations.

"Mia and Lucas are at mine, and Hannah is with Harry's mum. They're all going to come when the babies born."

"Oh good, good." Zayn nods and goes to sit down.  Robby follows him, and oh right. Robby.

He smiles at him and fiddles with his fingers, trying to sneak glances at Liam. This is not how he planned his night and if he's forced to be in this situation any longer, Zayn may burst.

"You don't have to stick around," Zayn whispers to Robby.

Robby shakes his head happily, "I'm fine. I love kids, so this is exciting for me."

Great. "Oh good," Zayn replies all joyful, but really.

"Were you guys on a date?" Liam abruptly asks.

Zayn looks up puzzled, "Hm?" As if he hadn't heard what Liam just asked.

Liam rolls his eyes and asks again louder, as if he was talking to a deaf person.

Zayn squints his eyes. "Yes, we were."

Liam smiles, "Nice. Where did you guys go?"

"Dinner."

"Oh, classic." Liam mocks.

Robby coughs beside him and speaks up, "I'm going to grab something to drink, did you want anything?"

"A coffee would be great, please." Zayn answers.

"I'll have a Pepsi," Liam says.

They both turn to him, Robby obviously discomfited and Zayn annoyed.

"Uh, okay..." He says before leaving the room.

Zayn is instantly up and stomps towards Liam. "What's your problem?" He demands.

Liam fixes his posture and bores his eyes into Zayns. "Nothing, just never knew you were going on dates."

"Aw, you jealous?'" Zayn mocks.

"No, but we're fucking with no condom, so I'm concerned for my health."

Zayn shoves Liam, "well we're not anymore," He spits out, hurt and angered by Liam's comment.

Liam comes forward and angrily whispers, "You should've told me you were seeing other people."

"My personal life doesn't concern you."

"So this," Liam points between them. "We're done?"

"yes."

"yes?"

"No...I don't know, are we?" Zayn asks, and ugh. He feels so stupid for allowing himself to be like this, but he can't help it. He can never push past his heart when it comes to Liam. Ever since he can remember, Liam has been it for him and time, divorces, Paris... nothing, can change it.

Zayn is looking elsewhere, trying to avoid Liam's eyes. Liam leans down and pecks him once, then twice, then three times. Just like he would in high school. Zayn has no self control, it appears, because he promptly has his arms around his neck, and is passionately kissing Liam. He shoves his tongue down his throat, and twirls their tongues together. It's forceful and hot and his body feels heat shake through every vein in the most beautiful way possible.

When they depart, they're out of breath, mouths red from the intense kiss. Liam smiles and nibbles his way up to his ear, "get rid of Robby and I'll come over tonight." He whispers and it should be wrong, it is wrong. But Zayn has never felt so right.

He nods his head and steps back, dazed and confused.

Robby returns with their coffees minutes later. Liam is pacing the room and Zayn pretends to be on his phone. (As if they've been like this since he left.)

"Anything happen?" Robby asks.

Zayn shakes his head, "nope, still waiting on news."

 

Twenty minutes later, Zayn tells Robby he isn't feeling well and to just go home. Liam is pretending to read a magazine, ears dropping and a smirk evident on his smug face.

 

They fuck that night and it's not painful as it usually is. Liam's being gentle and kind and he's kissing softly, (like their first time.) Zayn rides him and Liam never looks away, admiring every inch of his body as if he was art. He holds his waist, directing the speed, but never pressing rough touches into his abused skin. Liam leans forward and sucks his left nipple, nibbling the nub between his teeth. It's glorious and Zayn can't stop the whiny sounds that leave his open mouth.

"Keep bouncing on me, Zayn," Liam encourages. "Nearly there."

Zayn whines, leveling his hands on Liams chest, giving him a stronger grip as he fucks his arse down on Liams hard cock.

"So," Liam grunts, laying back down and letting Zayn be in control. "Good."

"Keep talking," Zayn demands, mind hazy with lust and power.

Liam digs his hands into his hair and pulls him down for a kiss. He licks into his mouth, then works his way down his sweaty chest, leaving kisses all over his body. "You look so fucking hot," Liam speaks.

"Y _es_ ," Zayn hisses, bouncing furiously, reaching his orgasm.

"I used to think you reached your peak in high school, but fuck was I wrong," Liam growls. "You're much more fitter now. Your skin tanned, muscles defined, cock absolutely delicious." Liam grabs his dick and strokes it up and down.

Zayn doesn't know if that was Liam being honest, or his lust filled mind speaking, regardless though, it's enough to push Zayn over the edge, his cock spurting come all over Liams chest and hand.

Liam holds Zayn as he collapses onto him, body dead weight and tired. Liam comes seconds later, his mouth hot against his ear.

"Open up," Liam whispers. Zayn moves his head up and is met with Liams fingers, come dripping from the digits.

Zayn automatically closes his lips around the three fingers, closing his eyes and moaning as he sucks his come.

"Fuck," Liam whispers in awe.

Zayn pulls back and collapses beside Liam. They're bodies radiating heat, the air overflowing differently then it usually is after they have sex. Zayn is sticky and sweaty, there is come dripping down his thighs,  but he thinks, there is no place he rather be.

Liam slowly sits up. "I should go," He says hesitantly. He dresses himself and doesn't look Zayn in the eye. Anything special they just shared is blown away by the new tension that has settled into the room.

Zayn coughs, "Yeah."

"I don't think we should do this anymore," Liam says and it's a whisper but Zayn hears it loud and clear.

"Okay." Zayn covers his eyes with his arm, afraid to look at Liam just in case he breaks down. He doesn't understand how Liam can drastically change, going from hot to cold in less than a few hours.

"I mean, I have a boyfriend and it's wrong. I'm cheating on him," Liam rambles. "This is wrong and we're responsible adults." He continues. Zayn thinks Liam is trying to convince himself more than him.

"Liam," Zayn snaps. "I get it. Not like this was ever going to go anywhere..." He drifts off, the words creating a concrete ache in his heart.

"Right." Liam nods, "cause you've left once, and who knows if you'll ever do it again."

"Will I ever redeem myself in your eyes?" Zayn asks. He hates how Liam can't let what happen go, though he can't expect him to.

Liam looks up to the ceiling and breathes in and out. Zayn waits for him, because he knows this part of Liam and years can't erase what he remembers. "No matter how hard I try, my heart doesn't let me let you in... I'm sorry."

Zayn wraps the sheet around his body and gets up, shaking his head, "you don't have to apologize."

"Yeah," Liam whispers. He lingers for a moment, staring at Zayn like he wants to say more. But he doesn't, he never did. He picks up his keys and leaves. It doesn't hurt Zayn, how can it, when he put himself into this situation. A few sessions of fucking wasn't going to fix years of pain created.

Maybe this was for the best.

 

 

 _"Dad and I are coming past tonight,_ " Mia says. 

Zayn makes a confused face over the phone, "okay, may I ask why?"

_"Not sure, Dad said just to tell you."_

"Um, okay," Zayn says puzzled. "Find out why and message me what he says."

 _"Why can't you guys just be friends,"_ Mia drags.

"We are friends," Zayn clarifies. Of course, Mia doesn't know about the recent events that have taken place over the past weeks. Ever since that night, Liam and Zayn haven't been in contact. Zayn has avoided him like the plague, slightly because he is embarrassed but the rest, because it hurts.

_"Whatever you say, Baba."_

"Mia," Zayn sternly says. "We are friends, if we weren't, he wouldn't be coming over, would he?"

He hears her laugh, " _True. So we'll come past after dinner?"_

"Yes perfect, I have to go back to work so I can leave earlier, but I'll see you tonight? Bring a change of clothes and we'll convince Dad to let you sleep over," Zayn suggests.

 _"Yes,"_ Mia hisses. _"Love you._ "

They say their goodbyes and Zayn goes back to work, distracting himself from the thoughts running through his mind.

Why were they coming past? Is Liam leaving Aaron leaving for him? Are they moving to Liverpool?

He focuses back onto his art and tries to not dwell on tonight's events, soon enough, he'll know.

 

Mia and Liam arrive at 7.30. Zayn feels on edge, every part of his body unable to stop shaking and moving, he's running on the what if's and if he is being honest, it's making him appear crazy.

"Did you want something to drink?" Zayn asks Liam, who's standing there as if he hasn't been here before.

"Tea, Thanks."

Zayn goes to make his tea, Mia behind getting herself a drink. "Dad didn't tell me what it's about, but I bet it's about moving."

Zayn drops some milk outside of the cup, he turns to Mia, "you know about that?"

Mia nods, "yeah, dad told me about it, like, two weeks ago." She takes her Pepsi and goes back to the lounge room.

Zayn has known about Liverpool, long before then. He wasn't sure what game Liam was playing, but he refused take part in it.

He comes back out and finds Mia playing Mario Kart.  Liam is on the edge of the couch, yelling in encouragement for her to win.

Zayn hands Liam his tea and sits on the far left of the couch.

"Dad!" Mia yells, never taking her eyes off the screen. "Stop it, you're not helping."

Liam gapes at her comment and sits back into the lounge, "rude," he mutters under his breath.

Zayn laughs behind his own cup, Liam notices and shakes his head in an amused way. "I always get so into Mario Kart."

"I know," Zayn smiles, "you broke my controller in high school when you thought I'd cheated."

"I still say you did," Liam declares. Zayn shakes his head fondly.

"You broke Babas controller over that?" Mia questions. Her game was now paused and her body has shifted so she's sitting crossed leg, facing them.

"Your father had anger issues in high school," Zayn teases.

"I didn't, I just had a smaller temper, compared to other people," Liam defends.

"Tell me more stories about you two, I've never heard any." Mia asks, eyes wide and pleading.

Zayn coughs, he didn't know what to say, or if Liam was comfortable with the topic.

"We used to always play fight, like boxing and stuff," Liam suddenly says. "And one time, your father decided to carry me, but he lost his balance and we both fell, I was lucky enough to crack my forehead on the edge of the door and needed six stitches." Liam laughs at the memory.

Zayn had completely forgotten about that, but now he remembers it so visibly.

"And I was freaking out and calling your mum to help," Zayn laughs. 

"You cried!" Liam chokes, "and didn't come over for a month."

"I was scared your parents hated me," Zayn admits.

Liam is shaking his head and smiling as he sips his tea.

"Tell me more, " Mia begs, "Did your parents get angry when they found out you got pregnant?"

Zayn nods, "I was petrified telling them and when I did, they told me to leave but a few hours later, they came to Liams house and hugged me, and said they'd support me."

"Your grandparents couldn't be angry, they had me around the same age. But, they were disappointed." Liam includes.

"Our parents were always so close, even before we started to date." Zayn reminisces.

"They're still best friends."

"Nan told me she walked in on you guys making out." Mia giggles.

"Oh my god," Zayn and Liam say in sync. Hiding their red faces.

"When did you start dating?" Mia asks after the giggles have died down.

"Um..." Zayn thinks.

"When we were 17," Liam says.

"We were really good friends before we began dating," Zayn adds.

Liam nods his head in agreement, "we always had sleepovers and kept our relationship a secret so they could continue."

"Your parents didn't let you sleep over each other's house when you began dating?" Mia asks.

They both shake their heads. "Liam would sneak over to mine at night and vice versa."

"You guys were bad." Mia laughs.

"Don't get any ideas, missy," Zayn adds.  Mia sticks her tongue out, that appears to be the end of the conversation and she turns back to play Mario Kart.

The atmosphere has changed, it's no longer clouded with tension but filled with a light. Zayn has never experienced this before, the vibe between Liam and Mia and himself. It's nice, and apart of him will crave it forever.

They're watching Mia race, Liam yelling at her to move fast and dodge the bananas. Zayn watches with fondness, laughing anytime Mia screams for him to stop.

Liam speaks up though. "I came to speak about Liverpool," He says. "We need to think of what we can do."

Zayn shakes his head, "I don't want to have this conversation." He looks at Mia who's biting her lip and game forgotten. She puts her eyes to the floor when he looks at her. Zayn givers her a questioning look.

"Can we not talk about this now, please dad?" Mia pleads.

Liam groans, "we have to speak about it soon. I can't keep tip toeing because you're unable to come up with a compromise, Zayn."

Anything good that just happened, has now disappeared. Liam is back to being a dick and Zayn has closed himself off.

"Don't bring Mia here to try to have this conversation, don't be a coward and hide behind her to talk about it."

"I thought we could all speak about it, but you're clearly unable to hold a civil conversation without getting defensive." Liam yells. He gets up, "Let's go, Mia."

Mia has her arms crossed and looks sad. It breaks Zayns heart. So he stops himself from yelling. "I just need time to process all of this, okay?"

Liam is looking at him and for once, Zayn is unable to read what he's projecting. A few moments pass before Liam nods his head once and tells Mia he's waiting in the car.

"Baba..." Mia drifts off.

"You have nothing to worry about," Zayn reassures.

Mia opens then closes her mouth and nods. "I'll see you at my student/teacher interview next week?"

"You aren't coming over this weekend?"

"Remember I have a sleepover at Mariams house?"

"Oh right, Okay, well I'll see you next week then." They say goodbye and Zayn ignores the questions he can see his daughter hiding behind her eyes.

He has never been able to talk with his daughter properly about the issues that need to be addressed. He called Liam a coward, but Zayn is one too.

 

 

Zayns late to Mia's student teacher interview. These last few weeks all he seems to be is fucking late. Fucking Liam, Zayn thinks. Ever since Liam found his way under Zayns skin, he’s turned everything around. Zayn is constantly late, his work is never finished on time and he still has bruises from Liam, that earn him worried stares. There's also the fact that he can't sleep at night without dreaming of Liam. They're not even dreams about hate, but rather love and happiness and what ifs. It's horrible and Zayn needs to find his centre again--he's breaking down a wall he took long to build.

When he arrives, the meeting is already taking place. Zayn knocks on the door and apologies. "There was a lot of traffic, I'm sorry."

Liam is glaring at him, Mia smiling and Aaron is looking straight ahead. Fucking Aaron.

Zayn sits on Mia's chair and she sits in his lap. Her teacher, Mrs Williams continues to speak. "As I was saying, Mia loves art and English but her lack of focus in geography and Math does bring her down in learning. She tends to go in her own little world sometimes and can be easily influenced by other peers."

"Is she rowdy?" Liam asks.

Mrs Williams shakes her head, "she's a very popular student but her distractions only affect her in the end."

"What can she do to improve?" Aaron asks. His hands are clasped together and if Zayn's being honest, he looks like a fucking wanker, wearing that grey polka dot sweater.

"Just focus more on herself and less on her peers, I suppose. Mia is a pleasant student to have but if she wants to see her grades go up, she needs to concentrate more."

"You say her best subjects are English and Art?" Zayn asks, intrigued by the comment.

Her teacher smiles and Mia blushes. "She loves writing poems and reading out loud. Those two subjects are her strongest points, and with English, she is second in her class."

Zayn cuddles her closely. "That's fantastic to hear." He says proudly.

Mia tries to pull away, face hot and covered as she giggles in her dad’s arms.

"I think that's all I have to say, did any of you want to ask me anything?" Mrs Williams asks.

Zayn goes to shake his head but is interrupted by polka dot man’s voice. "We uh, Liam and I. We're thinking of moving and that means Mia changing schools. We were wondering when you think it would be appropriate for her to start a new school?"

Zayn is fuming, body trembling with a power stronger than superman. Liam is stiff beside him, obviously aware of the tension that's now clouding the classroom.

"I'd wait until the school term is finished before changing schools, but in the end it comes down to the parents and their decisions."

Aaron smiles and they all thank her as they get up to leave.

"I'm going to punch your boyfriend in the face," Zayn whispers to Liam before stalking out of the classroom and damn school. He feels sick, stomach turning with every thought of Mia being away from him. How can they do this to him? How do they think they have a right to change Mia's whole world, for their own happiness.

"Baba!" Mia runs after him, "wait for me."

Zayn stops walking and tries to control his ragged breathing. He finds it difficult but seeing his daughters face calms him down a little bit.

"Can I sleep over tonight?" She asks. It's a Wednesday night and he has a meeting early in the morning. Zayn says yes.

"Yay," she jumps up and down, calling out to her father to come her way.

"Baba said I can sleep over tonight," Mia says once Aaron and Liam have joined the circle.

"Doesn't he usually have work early on Thursdays?" Liam questions, looking between the two.

Mia shrugs and Zayn glares. "What was that inside there, huh?" Zayn growls low. He looks to Aaron. "You can move, your boyfriend can move, but my daughter isn't."

"Liam has main custody over her, Zayn."

"What?" Zayn asks. His eyes are squinted in utter confusion. "We've had equal rights of her since she was nine, you stupid twat."

"Zayn!" Liam hisses, "Can we not do this here, right now, please." He begs.

"Mia isn't moving, her whole life is here and you're both selfish for wanting to leave."

"What, just like you did?" Aaron chides.

"Oh god," Liam mutters just as Zayn moves forward to shove Aaron. He goes stumbling backwards, losing his step and nearly falling on the ground.

"Baba!" Mia cries out, "Stop."

Aaron is red, face flushed with anger and embarrassment. Zayn unclenches and re-clenches his fists. All he wants, is to feel his knuckle pound into that stupid face. But his daughter’s voice drawls him back into reality. Loud sounds are travelling through his mind again, no longer hazy noise.

"I'm sorry," He says to Mia. She has tears in her eyes and is looking between all three men. Zayn goes to hug her, she doesn't pull away but she doesn't hold him either. Zayn feels his heart drop to his stomach.

"We need to all talk properly; this hostility can't go on any longer," Liam declares. He has an arm around Aaron's shoulder and his eyes are glaring into Zayns. Weeks ago he wouldn't have felt anything. Tonight, Zayn wishes Liam was holding him. Wishes those eyes weren't filled with resentment but love and concern, a tenderness he misses and he hadn't even noticed.

Liam and Aaron say goodbye to Mia. She’s upset with them too and Zayn hates that she's like this. He never wants to make her sad.

 

 

They don't talk on the drive home, Mia skipping dinner and heading straight for her room. Zayn feels like shit and can't finish his food. He wants to message Liam, ask for advice but then remembers why their all in this situation in the first place and decides against it.

It takes him half an hour to build the courage to go speak with his daughter. She's laying on her bed, ear phones in, staring at the ceiling.

Zayn sits on the mattress and smiles down at her. She removes her headphones and fiddles with her fingers. "I'm sorry about before. I shouldn't have reacted that way and I'm sorry if I scared you."

Mia wipes her eyes, "I forgive you." She murmurs.

"But do you?" Zayn insists. "Or are you just saying that so I'll leave you alone?"

Mia shrugs. Zayn nods sadly and then slides beside her. "I don't know about your father but I guess I haven't spoken to you about the moving ordeal because I've been in denial." Zayn admits.

"I don't want you to move and the idea of you leaving me breaks my heart. So I got angry and done what I thought was rational at the time but wasn't."

Mia looks up, her eyes wet once again. "You don't want me to go?" She whispers.

"Of course not," Zayn reassures. He wraps his arms around her. "You're my home and I wish I could be with you every day."

"I do too," Mia cries, tears spilling down her face wetting his chest.

" _Shh,_ baby _. Shh_ , we'll figure it out." Zayn coos.

"I don't want to leave any of you, I love you all," she hiccups.

"You won't have to, we'll sort it out." Zayn promises.

Mia cuddles closer into his warm body, tears having stopped.

They lay there, the silence, comfortable. Time passes, Zayn ready to drift off. But Mia speaks up, "Baba," she whispers.

" _Mm,_ " he hums.

"Promise you won't get upset?" She asks.

"Yes," he hums again, too lazy to form coherent words.

"You're my real dad and nobody can replace you but Aaron has always been nice to me and I like him... I'm sorry." Mia sniffles.

Zayn wipes her eyes and plays with her hair. (Distracting himself from the pain in his chest, focusing on his daughter’s needs.)

He's never been the perfect father. He missed her first day of kindergarten, her first broken bone. He missed her learning how to ride a bike and missed her first swimming competition. He missed milestones he'll never get back because he was selfish. Now is the time he can't be selfish.

"I'm not mad, Mia. Aaron is an important person in your life. I guess I've just been in denial about it, because I was jealous." Zayn confesses.

"You'll be my only Baba, though."

Zayn smiles, his face is wet and his heart aches but the body pressed against his side is numbing to his ribcage. "I love you. Maybe one day we could sit down properly so I can tell you why I wasn't always around."

"You told me that's in the past and it doesn't matter." Mia says puzzled.

Zayn snorts, "I said a lot of things to get out of telling you information. But. I'm realising there's things you do need to know and I can't keep looking at you like a baby, when you're growing into a young, amazing women."

Mia beams and leans up to kiss his face. "I love you, Baba."

"Love you too, angel."

 

Zayn cancels his work appointments first thing in the morning. He cooks pancakes for breakfast and they eat in bed while watching SpongeBob. He drops Mia off to school and promises to pick her up. He then goes to his favorite cafe and buys two coffees, one with two sugars because that's how he remembers Liam likes it.

He nervously walks into Liam's work. It's just Liam and another young man, since it's still early. He knocks on his door and inhales before entering.

Liam's face is filled with surprise before he skills his expression to be irritated.

"Hi," Zayn exhales, not realizing how long he was holding his breath.

"Uh, hi…"

"I bought you coffee," Zayn hands him the cup, "two sugars."

"You remember how I take it," Liam comments, sipping the beverage.

Zayn doesn't reply. He sits down in the chair in front of Liam's desk and fidgets with his own cup.

"Is there a reason you're here? Shouldn't you be at work?" Liam questions, eyes confused, looking for answers.

"I called in sick," Zayn shrugs.

"Wow," Liam mocks, "that's shocking."

Zayn nods, "yup."

There's an awkward silence and Zayn doesn't know how to fill it. He doesn't know why he's even here, he just needed to be. He can't always run or ignore the issues in life. He can't control it either. Sometimes things... have to be.

"I still remember the day I found out I was pregnant," Zayn reminisces. "I kept vomiting and everything hurt and you were by my side, chaotic and worried." He shakes his head fondly at the sudden memory.

Liam doesn't speak, just listens. Zayn is thankful. He continues, "Sometimes I couldn't sleep because of the anxiety I felt from the baby. It was this constant pressure along my heart and lungs and I would wake up trying to breathe. Every day that went by, my dreams slowly faded." Zayn feels tears prickle his eyes. The feeling he felt all those years ago, fresh in his mind.

“I was seventeen, pregnant with my first boyfriend, who I loved. But I wasn’t happy. And I took that out on Mia and you. I abandoned you both for many reasons, some I can’t even remember, looking back now.” Zayn huffs, “but back then my head was all over the place. I was being pulled in different directions and I didn’t know which way to go. In my mind I couldn’t follow my dreams and have a family, it had to be one. And I was selfish, so I chose the path that led me here.”

“Zayn--,” Liam interrupts. Zayn shakes his head, “please, let me finish?” he pleads.

Liam nods his head. Zayn breathes in and out, suddenly regretting having this conversation. But it’s one of the most important ones; he knows he’ll ever have.

“There is no excuse for my behaviour. I left, I fucked up and I live with that decision every day. But Liam, every what if means nothing when I know that no matter what, I would have ran. I felt claustrophobic and scared, I felt useless. The baby classes, the stares-- everything. It just consumed my terrified mind. My whole entire world fell apart.”

“I never told you any of this, because I knew you had your own issues. We lost communication and let our relationship diminish. You didn’t listen properly, and I didn’t care enough about your feelings. We got married because our parents forced us, not because we wanted too.”

“I wanted too,” Liam abruptly whispers.        

“What,” Zayn undertones.

“I wanted to marry you.” Liam states louder. “I loved you and you were having my child and even though we were young, I thought, if it had to be with someone, I’m glad it’s with you.”

“I, what,” Zayn stutters, shock paralyzing his body. He wasn’t expecting that statement out of Liam’s mouth.

“But we were so young Liam,” Zayn whines. “How could you want that for us?”

“I don’t know.” Liam looks anxious, body tense and shaky. “I didn’t care about school or my future like you did. Where I ended up wasn’t important to me, as long as I had you.” he confesses.

Zayn is about to pass out, despite the fact that he’s sitting down. The news like cold water splashed to his face. He is literally speechless.

“I didn’t realize how unhappy you were. You never told me, and I guess it’s partly my fault, since I apparently didn’t listen properly. But, I just wish you had let me in, we could’ve had everything you wanted.” Liam explains, voice soft with a tinge of resentment.

“And what happens if it didn’t work out?” Zayn asks. He can’t accept Liam’s response, it’s too easy and he’s learnt nothing is that simple.

“Then we would’ve kept trying. If we really loved each other, like we say we did, then nothing would have broken us.”

Zayn wants to vomit. Liam being the man he needed when he was seventeen. “I broke us.” Zayn says, more as a statement to himself then anything.

Liam shrugs, “like you said, we were young.”

Zayn wipes his eyes and looks away. He can’t even remember why he’s here anymore; he just wants to escape before the four walls crush him.

Liam leans forward and places his hand on top of Zayns, he squeezes it and smiles softly, “I’m glad you told me this.”

“Nine years too late.” Zayn scoffs, angry with himself that it took that long to confess how he was feeling.

“Better late than never,” Liam gently whispers.

Their hands are still touching and Zayn feels like a ton of bricks have left his chest. He’s been living with those memories for so long, a constant weight on his heavy heart and now... now, he feels free.

“What are we going to do about you moving with Mia?” Zayn asks, because they have to have this conversation without using sex as a weapon to not talk about it.

Liam sits back, his palms back in his lap. “I don’t know,” he sighs. “I don’t want to go,” he confesses. This intrigues Zayn. He’s never bothered to ask Liam how he feels about the situation, and maybe that’s the issue. Nobody ever asking Liam what he wants or how he’s feeling.

“Mia has a life here, she has you here.” Liam acknowledges. “She says she’s happy to move, but I don’t think she understands how drastic the change will be for her.”

“Don’t go then,” Zayn blurts out.

“Aaron wants to move…” Liam drifts off.

“Please don’t take her away from me, Liam.” Zayn begs, “She’s my entire world.”

Liam groans with frustration, “Whatever I choose, someone will end up unhappy.”

“Why can’t she stay with me and I'll drop her off on the weekends?” Zayn suggests.

“I’ve never been apart from her; I don’t think I can do it.”

“Then Aaron should move by himself,” Zayn jokes. (Kind of.)

Liam doesn’t respond. Zayn was trying to make a joke to lighten the mood, but he senses Liam didn’t take it that way.

“Joke,” Zayn laughs nervously.

“I can’t leave him. He was there when I was lonely. He helped me raise Mia and she adores him. I can’t have people constantly coming in and out of her life.” Liam divulges. Zayn bites his lip. He understands Liam isn’t trying to make him feel bad; he’s just being honest. Before last night, those comments would have hurt Zayn, made him angry and snap. Now it hurts to hear, because he’s caused this pain. He’s come and gone, he drove Liam into the arms of a free man who could be there when he wasn’t and that’s something he will live with, no matter what path Liam chooses to take.

Zayn crosses a boundary he never thought he would, he asks Liam a question he could possibly regret getting the answer for. “Do you love him?”

Liam quickly replies, “Yes,” it’s harsh and Zayn nods in acceptance.

“Do you uh, do you love me?” Zayn utters, fucking scared.

“I don’t know, Zayn,” Liam wails. “We lost so many years and after a few weeks of fucking we’re suddenly back to old times? It doesn’t work that way.”

Zayn puts his hands up, “just asking.”

Liam glares at him, eyes no longer cold. They haven’t been for quite some time. “I never stopped loving you… I mean, I thought I did, but I suppose it was denial mixed with bitterness.” Zayn confesses.

“I don’t trust you. I trust Aaron.” Liam says, ignoring his confession. Zayn thinks he deserves that.

“Okay,” Zayn gets up, having said everything he needed. This is all on Liam now.

“We’ll talk later?” Zayn lingers, halfway out the door.

“Do you know why Mia loves Paris so much?” Liam blurts.

Zayn furrows his eyebrows and moves forward, “why?” he asks.

“Because you lived there,” Liam explains. Zayns lip tremble and his body wobbles with waves of emotions. “For years she would ask to visit you in Paris and I’d say not now, or when you’re older. She doesn’t want to go to Paris because she loves it; she wants to go to Paris, because since she can remember, you chose living there, over her.”

Zayn is freely crying now, foot tapping as he waits for Liam to finish. “Was there a point to that?” he asks bleakly, no idea why Liam would break the nice moment they shared.

“No,” Liam shakes his head, “I’ve always wanted to tell you, is all.”

Zayn leaves, slamming the door.

 

 

Zayn has known Harry and Louis since he was pregnant. He met them one evening at teen pregnancy class for teens. Harry asked him what he was having, and the rest was history.

Zayn had Mia two months before Harry had Lucas. They would have play dates with the children and bitch about being new parents who had no idea what they got themselves into.

The four parents became a close family. Zayn was grateful to have Harry and Louis in his life. They kept him grounded as everything else slowly slipped away.

When Zayn packed up and left, he remembers leaving two letters, one for Liam and one for Harry. It was hard to say goodbye, without actually saying goodbye. His heart ached to stay but every other part of him was already gone.

He worked for a small graphic design company after he finished high school. It was flexible and could easily be done from home. He progressed in the business and four years later, they offered him a job in Paris.

He told nobody.

Zayn lived in Paris for five years, working his way up to becoming one of the main editors of the entire company. Mia and Liam were constantly on his mind, so he worked harder to forget who he left behind.

That didn't mean he didn’t love them. He missed them too much, and work seemed like the only escape at the time. He would send presents to Mia on her Birthday and Christmas. He would send postcards with only I love you's written on the back. Zayn never got any replies, didn’t expect any, although the ache in his chest never settled.

Mia and Zayn spoke on the phone a few times, but it was too hard and emotional. She would ask when he's coming back and Zayn could never reply, his mouth rapidly dry and filled with every type of despair.

He and Harry would speak sometimes. Harry would tell him stories about Mia growing up, how her and Lucas were attached at the hip.  Zayn was grateful for Harry. He wasn’t grateful when Harry called him one lonely evening, bombarding him with news about Liam’s boyfriend. Zayn demanded answers. Who he was, how long they’ve been together, and does Mia like him. He had no right to be upset, of course, he was the one who left, but. He couldn’t control his feelings, they escaped and scattered themselves around his body. Zayn remembers crying that night and understanding the true meaning of regret.

The next month he was offered a manager position at a new office expanding in London. Zayn didn’t hesitate to say yes. He was never one to believe in fate, or meant to be, etc. But he always believed in second chances and this was his.

It wasn’t easy being welcomed back into Mia’s life. Liam refused to let Zayn see her. There were court dates, loud arguments. There was tears (on Zayns behalf,) there was Zayn having to prove himself worthy to be back in his daughters life before he could reconnect with her.

She had just turned nine when he saw her and it felt like clarity the moment they embraced. There was no tentative looks or scared peers from behind her father's strong stance. Mia hugged him as if she’d been doing it all her life.

At times it was awkward and Zayn felt out of depth when Mia asked questions he was unable to answer. There was times when he felt more like her best friend, rather than her father.

Soon enough, as time went on, things changed. Their bond developed differently and it was as if Zayn never left.

Zayn and Liam never reconnected. Liam couldn’t forgive Zayn for what he did, and Zayn never expected him to. They weren’t the same people like they were when they were young. They were forced to grow up and mature faster than most kids their age would.

Zayn still loved Liam; it wasn’t something that could disappear, no matter how much time passed by. But, the more time passed, the more it seemed like Liam got bitter at Zayns reappearance into Mia’s life. His hatred was projected so much, that Zayn began to hate Liam. The love he thought he had, disappeared and he was left with resentment himself.

 

Zayn locks himself away for one week. He doesn't answer emails, phone calls and only texts here and there to reassure people he's alive . Mia thinks he's in another country for work and Liam hasn't contacted him. Zayn pretends it doesn't hurt. Pretends he doesn't care that Liam hasn't tried to speak to him but it's hard when he knows the reason he's currently this way, is because he's waiting on Liam.

He doesn't know how he went from hating Liam, resenting him for the past 13 years to gradually realizing he's loved him all this time. That nothing changed, only he's opened up his heart and his emotions are finally able to be free.

He misses Liam.

He loves Liam.

And for some reason, Zayn created this notion that it was going to be okay in the end, that the sex and the conversations afterwards could heal the wounds he created within Liam. It was far from truth and as Zayn lays on his king size bed, chest hurting, and every core of him lonely, he knows he was foolish. If there was ever a time for him to do the right thing in his selfish life, now was the time.

 

Zayn knocks on the door, fingers trembling as he holds onto the letter. Liam answers in his work clothes. His short hair stuck to his face where there is grime and hands black from the oil. His boots still on and shirt thrown over his shoulder, his defined muscles and chest enhanced in the sunlight. He looks beautiful and Zayn feels an ache clog his chest.

Zayns a selfish person. He knows his flaws and for once, he's choosing against his needs and putting his family first.

"Hey," Liam says. "What are you doing here?"

Zayn hands him the envelope. "This is a goodbye, I guess."

Liam's eyes widen, "you're not leaving are you?" He hesitantly asks.

Zayn laughs, "no." He bites his lip, "but I am letting you go. The letter is for Aaron... you can read it, if you want. But uh," Zayn stutters, he's shaking and trying not to cry. "It explains things, is all."

Liam nods his head, twirling the paper in his hands, his thick fingers gripping the edges. "Um, I'll show him."

Zayn smiles and leaves. That was it, he supposes.

 

 

** Dear Aaron, **

** I never welcomed you into Liam and Mia's life because I was in denial. I felt as if I had a right to be upset about them moving on, when I was the one who left. I've messed up and I could keep saying sorry, but somehow, it will never be enough. So I'll say thank you. Thank you for being there for my daughter when I wasn't. I've never liked you... I actually hated you. In my mind you stole my family from me but I now realize all you did was fix what I broke. We have one thing in common and that's our love for Mia. I hope one day we can be civil around another. I apologize for my hostility. Take care of Liam and Mia. I'm glad they found someone who will be there for them. Whatever decision you choose to make about moving, I'll support it. **

** -Zayn **

 

 

Liam is a simple man. He likes simple things and never wanted more in life then stability and happiness. When he was fourteen he met a boy who smiled too much and spoke to little. When he was 15 he began to question his sexuality because of said boy. When he was 16 he understood the meaning of love. At age 17 he acted upon those feelings.

Years later, he understood what a broken heart meant. But you can't carry a broken heart while raising a child, it seemed impossible, so Liam did what he thought he had to do. He locked his scattered heart away. It never got repaired, it only hid behind the walls he built.

When Zayn left he took every piece of Liam that existed. Liam only survived through his daughter and what she gave him. How was he meant to live everyday when the person he wanted to live with, left.

It took Liam time to forget about Zayn and admit to himself, he was never returning. It was a hard, difficult process but time slowly changed the hurt into anger, and in some way, that was easier to live with.

Liam remembers meeting Aaron at Mia's school. He was sweet and kind and nothing like his ex husband. He soon became a fixture in Liams life, but never a replacement of Zayn, only a diversion. He loved Aaron, he was there when nobody was and he helped heal many wounds. Mia adored him too, Aaron distracted her from Zayn leaving. He was good for them.

It's not to say that Zayn was no longer on Liams mind-- he constantly was, but it was all bitter thoughts, memories and ideas that became darkness in his overbearing mind. When Zayn returned, Liam wanted to punch him. He couldn't believe Zayn had the audacity to return, as if his presence was okay. Liam wanted to guard Mia and his heart from him. But, Mia wanted to see her father and Liam had no power to stop her, he couldn't, when he knew how much she missed him. When he left, Liam believes Zayn took a piece of Mia too and when he returned, it was like their connection was restored.

It wasn't simple for Liam and Zayn and Liam promised himself he would never let Zayn in again. He despised him, resented him. He accepted that Zayn would be out of his life for good. He never planned for his return and Liam was hit with unexpected emotions hovering around.

Zayn tried to talk with Liam one on one but he refused, they were never alone-- Liam couldn't be by himself without anyone to anchor him down from the ship that abandoned him. It was a roller-coaster of up and downs but finally, they reached a place they could equally live with-- be civil for the sake of their daughter and mutual friends.

It hurt to be around Zayn and not be able to touch him, talk to him, laugh with him. Liam believed that Zayn didn't deserve to have him that way anymore. So Liam continued to bottle up his feelings and throw the bottle away, but it seemed like the waves of his heart always brought them back to shore.

He doesn't know how he spent years hating Zayn, to fucking him continuously. When he had sex with Aaron, Zayns face kept appearing. When he closed his eyes and daydreamed, it was about a life with Zayn. It was as if his walls started to crack and his heart truly started to show what he really wanted, (Always needed.)

And here he was now, holding a letter that will determine his future. He's scared shitless. Scared of Zayn and how he makes him feel, scared he'll leave and how that will affect his daughter. He wasn't strong enough to deal with the loss again.

He hides the letter and goes to shower. Aaron comes home an hour later and Liam feels guilt settle upon his ribcage. No matter what he chooses, someone will get hurt-- he just knows, it can't be him again.

"Hey boo, good day, today?" Aaron pecks him on the lips and Liam feels disgust within himself.

"Yeah, just extra tired." He replies softly.

Aaron begins to massage his back and apart of Liam automatically pulls away. Aaron scrunches his eyes brows and Liam kisses his cheek, "sorry babe, just not feeling well."

"Go lay down and I'll make dinner tonight." Liam smiles and leaves. Grateful Aaron has never been pushy with speaking about feelings, not like Zayn who wears his heart on his sleeve and no. Liam has to stop thinking about Zayn and focus on anything but.

He falls asleep on Mia's bed. Her smell and the atmosphere, a comforting pressure to his sunken, confused heart.

 

**\--**

_"She won't stop crying," Zayn shot. He's cradling Mia in his tired arms, but she won't stop fucking crying, and Zayn doesn't know what to do._

_Liam comes back out of the kitchen with her bottle, "Here, give her to me." He extends his hands and takes Mia into his arms. "There you go, baby." Liam soothes, rocking her while she drinks her milk._

_Zayn sighs, the ringing in his ears has stopped. "I didn't know how much work a baby would be." Zayn admits._

_Liam gives him a funny look, "did you expect it be sunshine and daisies?"_

_Zayn rolls his eyes and stalks off, not in the mood to argue with Liam--  since it's all they ever do lately._

_He goes to his laptop and continues working on a work project that was due Thursday. Moments later Liam appears-- no baby in his hand but an angry look etched on his face._

_"Can you stop working for one minute and focus on us?" Liam asks._

_Zayn groans, "I work to pay the bills, Liam."_

_"You work and forget you have a family." Liam slams his laptop shut. Zayn gets up and faces his angry husband. "Fuck.off," he punctuates._

_Liam is tapping his foot and crosses his arms, "I don't understand how you thought this would be easy."_

_"I knew it wouldn't be easy, but it shouldn't be this difficult." Zayn defends._

_"She's a fucking baby and we're new parents, we got to suck it up." Liam seethes._

_"We're fucking teenagers who got into a situation without thinking properly," Zayn admits. He knows Liams reply before he has even spoken the words._

_Liam rolls his eyes, "all you do is complain. Complain and control." (Point proven.)_

_Zayn nods his head in a patronizing way. What else could he say that would make Liam fucking hear him. There's only so many words he can repeat without the other person giving a damn to listen._

_"Well?" Liam says, "Anything else you want to add?"_

_Zayn looks up to the ceiling, clicking his tongue under his gum as a diversion from crying. He hates fighting with Liam, it physically hurts him. But, he can't live like this anymore ,either. He's already on the verge of breakdown and not even the person he turns to, is able to save him._

_"Let's not do this, please," He begs. "I'm just tired, you're barely home and I can never get a moment to process anything by myself."_

_Liam pouts and the anger vanishes from his body. He pulls Zayn close and cuddles his face into the crook of his neck. "I know it's overwhelming but we'll be fine." He reassures._

_"yeah," Zayn whispers half half heartedly."Okay."_

 

 **\--**  

"Dad," Mia whispers.

Liam groans and tosses around in her bed. "Mmm."

"Why are you asleep in my room?" She asks.

He opens one eyes and stares up to her questioning face. She looks so similar to Zayn, it used to scare Liam. Her high cheekbones, eyes that hold a tinge of yellow, her nose which arches-- all like her father.

"Your bed is comfortable," he lies. He gets up and stretches, cracking his back and neck.

"I hate when you do that," Mia grunts, fixing her sheets. Also a habit she got off her father, Liam points out.

"If you sleep in my bed, fix it up when you're done." She commands. Liam brushes aside her comment and pulls her in for a hug. "Look at my daughter, thinking she can talk to me like that," He teases.

"Dad," Mia drags the 'd'. "Stop," She pouts.

Liam snickers and lets go. "My baby all growing up, how will I survive," He mocks.

She frowns at him and sticks her tongue out, "You're so weird, dad."

Liam gapes, "I can literally ground you."

"Then I'll just go to Baba's," She utters but there's a twinkle of teasing behind her eyes and even though she acts annoyed, Liam knows they have a respectful, honest relationship.

"Want to go grab some desert?" Liam suggests.

"You didn't even eat dinner?" Mia points out.

Liam shrugs and places his arm around her shoulder, "I feel like pancakes."

Mia shrugs too, "Okay." She says, as if someone would turn down pancakes.

 

They're at Liams favorite restaurant in Camden eating pancakes, ice-cream and drinking milkshakes. They're going to feel sick afterwards, but they both agreed, they don't care.

"So," Mia begins. "Why'd you bring me here and why isn't Aaron with us?"

"Does something have to be going on for me to do this with you?" Liam asks.

Mia shrugs and pushes her hair out of her face, ignoring his question to drink her strawberry milkshake.

"Mia..." Liam drifts off. "Answer me," He demands but not harshly, just concerned.

"I don't know," She drawls, "we never hang out, just us too."

"Yes we do," Liam insists.

"When was the last time we hanged out together?" Mia asks.

Liam opens his mouth but no words come out. He closes it as fast and stares at his daughter, her eyes screaming, 'I told you so.'

"I didn't realize." Liam admits, feeling guilty.

"It's okay, you have Aaron and I'm out with my friends and stuff..." She says to justify his wrongful actions.

"Don't make excuses for me. I'm sorry, I wasn't aware I did that. I'll change." Liam promises.

Mia smiles, "Okay, I'd like that."

Liam bites his lip. "Do you and Baba hang out a lot?"

Mia looks up, her teeth biting into her bottom lip too. Liam knows the answer without her having to say anything.

"It's okay, I'm glad," Liam reassures. "I'm always happy that you and your father get along so well."

"Yeah, we do. It's going to suck when we move."

Liam feels like he's been slapped in the face. The reality of the moving situation, finally hitting him in full view. He was moving to run, to run from his past, to run from Zayn and as he was running, he'd missed all the signs telling him to stop. His fear and bitterness was making him blind to his daughters needs.

Zayn left and it killed him and hurt Mia. But he's back and he's doing the best he can to make up for lost time. How can Liam take away what Zayn's working for, deeming it impossible for him to mend what he broke. Liam's brain is buzzing with clarity. His body is vibrating with desire, with passion, with a need to see Zayn-- see Zayn, when his walls have cracked down and what's left is a heart that simply longed for what it had missed all along.

Liam knows he has reservations and he has his doubts but he can't continue to live a lie, in fear he's going to get hurt again. He craved stability, he craved happiness and got it. Yet all this time, it never fulfilled him and now he knows why.

"Dad, why are you smiling like that. You're scaring me." Mia breaks through his thought.

He's jumpy and alert, he feels high, every sensation-- intense. It's overwhelming. But, it's good, it's okay.

"Let's lay it out on the table, Mia." Liam begins.

Mia looks at him, slightly scared. "Uh..."

"Do you want to move to Liverpool?"

Mia shakes her head and whispers, "no." like she is afraid to hurt his feelings. Liam could burst with the love he feels. He's so proud and thankful he and Zayn created her, together.

"Same," Liam admits. "I have to do something." He blurts out.

"Really? oh my god, and what?" Mia asks all over the place.

"I need to see your father," Liam considered lying, but the truth came out on its own terms.

Mia makes a confused face, "why?"

"It's a long, awkward story to have with your daughter and your Baba always said I was never good at speaking and listening, but," Liam rambles, taking in a breath, "I need to tell him something."

"I'm so confused, Dad."

Liam laughs like a maniac, "I promise I'll explain everything, but first I have to do this."

"Can I come?"

"Yes... if you want to see us kiss." Liam laughs. He gulps down the rest of his chocolate milkshake.

"Ew," Mia whispers. "Wait, are you and Baba getting back together?" She questions, really bemused and slightly disgusted now.

"Yes, maybe...I don't know."

"I thought you hated each other?" Mia questions, following her father's gaze to the waiter he's calling over. He's rushing and moving quickly, adrenaline kicking in.

Liam turns back and looks her dead in the eye. "I don't hate him." She breaks out into a massive grin. "Cool."

They pay for their food and leave in a hurry. "I don't want to see you guys kiss." Mia pleads, "drop me off to Lucas' house on the way."

"That's out of the way," Liam complains.

"This is like, child abuse, making your daughter watch that."

Liam turns and gives her a stern, unamused look. "You're being dramatic, but fine, call and see if it's okay."

She smiles and takes out her phone. They're on the way there, and she's still on speaking to Lucas.

"Dads gonna kiss Baba," Mia reveals to him.

Liam changes gear to stop himself from breaking too hard at the sudden comment she's made. "Mia!" He yells, "don't tell people."

She looks up to Liam from her seat, "Dad, it's Lucas."

Liam gawks, "that doesn't make a difference," He scolds.

"Dads angry now." Mia says to Lucas, ignoring her father. "I'll see you soon."

Liam shakes his head and focus' on the road. He remembers having a best friend who he wanted to tell everything to. He can't scold his daughter for a feeling he's known before.

When he arrives at Harry's, the whole family is outside. Liam could honestly kill his daughter right now, if he wasn't so hyped off good vibes.

"Good luck, Liam." Harry grins.

Liam laughs and shakes his head, "Thanks Tomlinson cheerleaders."

Harry breaks out in a dance, "go, Liam, go." He cheers.

"Go Uncle Liam, go," Hannah screams, copying her father.

Liam blows them kisses. He winks to Mia, she winks back and grins widely. He feels good, the adrenaline feeling still coursing through his veins.

 

Liam never thought himself a selfish person. He tries his hardest to be genuine, and kind. He sends his parents money every week, he does pro bono on his customers cars, because he knows how expensive it can be for some people. He coached Mia's football team for four years, up until last year,(and only because she stopped playing.) He was willing to move for Aaron, knowing it would make him happy.

See, Liam isn't selfish but as he drives to Zayns house, anxious and giddy, he thinks maybe he should've spoken with Zayn properly when they were 17. He should've asked Zayn if he wanted the baby, and not automatically assumed he did. He knows neither regret Mia, and everyday are thankful to have her, except, it was the principle and he finally understands.

As he walks up to Zayns house, the moonlight hidden by the big trees, the lamps on the street bright enough to spread light, he breathes in the spring air and knocks, nervous and slightly afraid.

Zayn opens the door-- his eyes are blood red, his hair is in a bun and he's wearing grey trackies with an old baggy jumper Liam gave him and this moment, it's similar to seeing everything for the first time, it's Liams simplicity.

"That's my collage jumper." Is the first thing Liam says.

Zayn looks down then back up, every part of him abnormally slow. "Did you want it back?" He asks, his voice monotone.

Liam laughs, "No."

Zayn gives him a puzzled look, "What are you doing here?" His voice slightly high pitched now.

Liam heart softens, Zayn is presenting himself as if he didn't expect Liam to ever choose him. Like the idea was always out of the equation. "I love you." Liam says undoubtedly.

Zayn looks up, giving Liam slight whiplash. "What?" He murmurs.

Liam smirks and moves forward, closing the space between their bodies. "I," he begins. "Love you."

"I-," Zayn stutters. "I thought..." He trails off. He's speechless and Liam finds that endearing, considering he always has something to say.

"Did you want me to scream it out?" Liam teases.

Zayn shakes his head, face brightening up. "Aaron?" he asks.

Liam kind of forgot about that situation and he knows he will have to deal with it sooner or later, but for right now, he just wants this to be about Zayn and him. "I'm breaking it off, Zayn. I choose you," Liam acknowledges.

Zayn stares into his eyes, searching for something. He must've found it-- instantly he jumps into Liams arms, kissing his soft lips. "I love you, I love you, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I love you," Zayn rambles in between kisses.

Liam laughs, "There's nothing to be sorry about." He pulls back and holds Zayns face. "This is our fresh start, yeah?"

Zayn smiles widely, his tongue pokes out between his lips and his eyes hold a sparkle. "Yeah," He exhales.

They lean in for another kiss. It's soft and cautious. Liam opens his mouth and allows Zayns tongue to slip in. He sucks on the tip, drawing him as close as his body will possibly allow. They stand there kissing and breathing each other in.

Zayn draws back all smiles now, his attire not suiting his complexion. "Where's Mia?" He asks.

Liam snorts, "where do you think?"

Zayn rolls his eyes and grabs a hold of his hand, pulling him into the house. "We should fuck," He suggests, kissing Liams neck and pushing their bodies together, intensely.

"Okay," Liam detaches himself from Zayns hungry hands to push him backwards onto the lounge. He removes his jumper and shirt and straddles Zayn open legs.

"Love you." They say at the same time. Liam leans down and presses his forehead to Zayns, they're giggling, bodies in sync with one another.

Liam moves to suck a bruise on his neck, while Zayn rubs up against his jeans. "We should talk, though." Zayn says breathless.

"Mmm," Liam hums.

"No, really," Zayn moans when Liam grabs his cock. "We have a lot to talk about."

Liam leans back, "I agree." He crawls down onto his knees and pulls Zayns trackies down. "But did you want to talk now or after I deep throat you?"

"After," Zayn squeaks.

Liam wiggles his eyebrows, "thought so."

 

\-- 

**Paris, 3rd of August.**

"Mia," Zayn drags, "We've been to the Eiffel tower, three days in a row now."

Mia turns around and walks backwards, "it's the Eiffel tower, Baba, how are you annoyed over this?"  

"Because it's the same as every other day."

Liam giggles, "Leave her alone, babe." He squeezes his hand. Zayn looks over to Liam and smiles. He still can't believe they're holding hands and walking around Paris, together, as a family.

Mia is walking ahead, as always. She has her phone out, taking selfies and most likely messaging Lucas. Zayn knows the phone bill be large this month, but this is her birthday present, and he won't take it away from her.

They're under the Eiffel tower now, watching people climb the stairs or use the elevators. "I think I wanna climb it now," Mia says.

Zayn and Liam groan in sync, "Make up your mind, Missy." Zayn says, frustrated his daughter can never make a decision.

She narrows her eyes, "I have a week to decide." She states.

"Not unless we leave early," Liam suggests.

Mia gapes, "this is how you treat your only daughter?" She shakes her head, "I'm disgusted, fathers."

They both laugh out loud, Liam jumping on Mia to hug her. "Dad," She groans. "Not in public." Typical teenager, Zayn thinks.

Mia pushes Liam off with a slight smile and fixes her hair. She takes her phone out and looks to them, "selfie?"

She puts the phone in front of her face and Liam and Zayn come up on either side of her, faces squashed together. "Say Bonjour!" They all smile, mouths open and eyes crinkled. When the photo is taken Mia remains looking it for a moment, a content smile on her face.

Zayn will hold that moment in his heart forever.

"Have you decided what you want to do?" Liam asks.

Mia bites her lip and twirls her hair, "um, let's go to the Louvre."

"Are you sure you don't want to climb it?" Liam questions before they take off to the other side of Paris. (They've been walking everywhere, since Mia refuses to catch public transport, wanting to absorb all of Paris.)

She begins to walk away and Zayn grabs Liams hand and follows her. "Is she spoilt or are all teenagers like this?" Zayn asks amused.

"I ask myself that every day." Liam snickers.

"Dad, Baba!" Mia yells. She's got her phone out and is calling them over. "Stand here." She demands. They do as she asks. She moves back and smiles.

"Perfect," She beams. "Smile for the camera."

Zayn and Liam look behind them and notice the Eiffel tower is a perfect distance away to capture them, with it.

They look to one another and grin, "I love you." Liam says.

"I love you, too." Zayn leans in for a kiss and ignores Mia's disgusted comment. She'll still take the photo, much to her dismay.

After they're done, Zayn whines to Mia, "Show us." She rolls her eyes and hands over the phone. Liam and Zayn peer down to the picture, the sunlight is hidden behind the tower, enough to brighten up the background, but not hide Liam and Zayns figures. Zayn zooms the photo in, noticing their smiles in the kiss. It's cheesy and cute, and will definitely be framed when they go back home.  Zayn makes all of them come in for one last photo, their smiles so wide, it makes the Eiffel tower look tiny.

The last time he was in Paris, Zayn was alone. This time around, he's with his family, how it should've always been.

He knows he has to make up for lost time and Zayn tries his best every day. His relationship with Liam isn't perfect, but as his hand fits in Liams, he knows it's okay, they've been through teenage pregnancies, divorces, ex boyfriends and much more, they're strong enough to handle anything that comes their way.

Zayn got his second chance and he'll never fuck up again.

 

 


	2. Mia POV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A small chapter of Mia's POV. It's nothing interesting and I hope my comment in the last chapter didn't get you all excited.

"C'mon, babe, stop being scared." Lucas whines.

Mia stops biting her nails long enough to twirl around to her boyfriend, "don't push me." She snaps, nervous and scared. He shakes his head fondly, used to her hesitations.  
"What happens if they don't approve of us?" Mia asks.

Lucas comes and wraps his arms around her waist, resting his chin on her shoulder, "why wouldn't they? They've known me since I was a baby."

"Baba's going to be disappointed, I feel it." She ignores Lucas' words and focuses on her breathing. This was massive deal for her, and Mia wasn't sure why. Her fathers were open, caring parents who supported her in all aspects of life. And yet, she couldn't tell them, she was dating Lucas and has been for the last six months. It's a nerve racking feeling, introducing your partner to your parents and for some reason, it's worse because she had to introduce Lucas.

Mia looks through the ajar door, her parents and Lucas' sitting down laughing and chatting. Her dad has his arm about Baba, using his shoulder as a shield to muffle the laughter anytime Uncle Louis says something funny. They look so happy and at ease. She doesn't want to walk in and ruin their good mood.

Ty spots her from across the room, (being a three year old and all) and begins to waddle over towards her. Mia groans and moves away from his eye sight.

"Why is your brother so annoying?" Lucas asks, hidden away too.

"Don't talk shit about my brother," Mia says offended. "Only I can."

'You always said shit about Hannah and Lilly when they were young," Lucas accuses.

Mia can't deny that. It wasn't her fault her baby brother was cute and Hannah and Lilly were wild and crazy and never knew when to stop and take it easy. "It's different." She settles for.

Lucas rolls his eyes, "That's it, I'm going to tell them myself." He begins to walk off. Mia whispers no and grabs onto his hands, eyes pleading to look at her own. "I'm going to do it." She promises. "I just need some time to process things. Go out and try to woo them and I'll come out soon."

Lucas stares at her for a moment, his green eyes stand out more than ever since he decided to shave his brown, curly hair. He bites his bottom lip, thin like his father Louis and nods his head. "Don't take too long, the lads wanna pre drink before Alison's party."

"Oh my god, what happens if I'm not allowed to go out anymore, after I tell them?" Mia stresses, mind swimming with all the negative possibilities that could come from this confession.

"Have you met your parents?" Lucas places his hands on her cheeks and moves forward so their foreheads are touching. He sighs and says, "Just do what I do and bring up the past. Remind them that they had us when they were seventeen, so they can't lecture you."

"Does that work?" Mia asks, interested by this approach.

Lucas smirks that hot smirk of his and steps back, "Like a charm." He pecks her on the lips before waltzing out to the lounge room, screaming 'dad.' Mia hears everyone yell out of fear and giggles into her arm. Her boyfriend was a knob head.

After her giggles die down, Mia takes one last peak to assess the situation. Lucas is listening to her dad ramble on about something. Deep down she knows her father's love and adore Lucas. They're a massive family, but she can't seem to scratch an itch within her, and can’t understand why.

Mia used to assume she didn't believe in love. Watching her parents hate each other (even though they pretended not to) made Mia cautious on how she approached her feelings. She wasn't into relationships-- only Lucas, but back then, she supposed what she felt was love as a best friend, not the urge for more. Six months prior she turned sixteen and her group of friends were there and they decided to play spin the bottle.

Lucas span, it landed on Mia. The rest was history.

She groans, frustrated that she's being dramatic, though she's not. She's being cautious and weary, always afraid of how her father's see her. They're the most important people in her entire life and the idea that she'd ever disappoint them, is the biggest fear of all.

She inhales, exhales and walks out. Everyone looking up at her. "Where were you?" Zayn asks.

Shit sits beside him and flips her hair, "On the phone."

"Ty said he saw you hiding behind the door." Liam laughs, always seeing through her lies. She glares at her father and looks to Ty.

"I saw you with Luca behind tha door," Ty stutters out. If he weren't three and her parents weren't insanely in love with their son, Mia would push him on the floor.

"They're attached at the hip, that's why," Hannah comments. Everyone excluding Lucas agrees with her.

Mia sticks her tongue out, "Okay, we were behind the door. Sue us."

"Yeah, probably snogging." Hannah teases. Mia chokes on air and drinks her Babas tea.

"Shut up, Hannah," Lucas snaps.

"Don't talk to your sister like that, Lucas." Harry intervenes.

"They probably were, looking at their reactions," Zayn jokes. And oh my god, Mia thinks. She feels like dying.

"Uncle Zayn, would that be such a bad thing?" Lucas questions, his voice asking as a joke-- being all but.

"No, me and your dad have a bet you two will Marry," He jokes. And what. Mia looks to her father with wide eyes, not sure if he's being serious.

"Mia promised me she wouldn't date until after sixth form," Liam points out. That was true, but she had made that bet when she was young and boys were the last thing on her mind.

"I was eleven, dad."

"Still a promise."

"Am I missing something?" Harry speaks up looking between her and Lucas. "I feel like you want to tell us something."

Mia bites her lips and turns away from her father's questioning eyes. You can do this, she tells herself and stands up to sit beside Lucas.

"Baba, Dad," She looks between the two. They're staring at her with patient eyes, a glint of knowing in them. She knows they're waiting for her to actually tell them. "Lucas and I are dating." She grabs a hold of her boyfriend's hand and squeezes the fuck out of it, it's helping with the pressure in her lungs.

"I knew it!" Louis yells, he's laughing and looking between all three men. "I called it."

Zayn is gaping and Liam is struggling to hold in his laughter after Zayns reaction.

"When did this start?" Zayn questions.

"Um," Mia coughs.

"A few months ago." Lucas begins, "We wanted to make sure we were serious before telling you all."

Liam smiles, "That's kind." He's rubbing his husbands back, trying to massage away the knots in his straining body. "Darling, say something else." He whispers under his breath.

"Congratulations?" Zayn says, asks-- he wasn't quite sure.

Mia jumps up, "really? You're okay with this?"

Zayn huffs out a laugh and looks to Liam with wide eyes, as if to ask "am I?" Liam speaks on behalf of them, "yes, of course. As long as you're both happy, we are too." He gets up and pulls Zayns limp body along with him. Mia jumps into her father's arms and squeezes them tight. All she ever wants is their approval and to finally have the weight lifted off her shoulders, she feels light as a feather.

"No teen pregnancies," Zayn scolds. Everyone in the room laughs, Zayn doesn't find that amusing. "I'm being serious."

Mia hugs her Baba, whispering into his ear, "I know."

Mia pulls back, face hurting from all the smiling she's done. "Well, now that you all know, we have a party to go to." Lucas chimes in over the mixed voices.

"Who's party?" Liam questions.

"Alison's. Remember I told you yesterday?"

Liam is about to speak but Harry cuts him off, "Let them go." He says, winking towards Mia and Lucas.

"Call me if you need a lift home," Zayn nags, kissing and hugging Mia goodbye.

"I will, Baba. Love you." She says goodbye before Lucas pulls her away.

Once they're outside, waiting for Bobby to pick them up, Lucas pulls Mia to the wall and kisses her. "I told you they wouldn't care."

Mia laughs, "Sorry I care what my parents think." She jokes.

"I'm glad you told them though," Lucas says seriously. Mia smiles and leans forward to kiss her boyfriend. Her first kiss was Lucas and she hopes he is the last.

 

The next morning Mia feels the regret of last night hang in her head and stomach. She feels like shit and those seven shots she did, no longer seemed like a good idea. All she wants to do is sleep in, and maybe vomit. But it's Sunday, which is family day.

She checks her phone and sees it's only 10am. She groans and turns back over to sleep for a little while longer. However, Ty runs in and jumps on her bed. "Wake up!" He sings, jumping around her body, making her feel dizzy. 

"Piss off, Ty." She moans, head pounding and stomach turning.

"Dada said not to say swear words to me." Ty taunts.

Mia looks up to her little brother, his black hair all over the place. They look nothing alike, she thinks. She got her father's side and Ty got her Babas side. Maybe they do have the same lips... Maybe.

"Then leave me alone." Mia shot.

Ty sticks his tongue out and pushes her head into the pillow before running away. "Baba!" Mia screams. "Tell Ty to stop annoying me."

A few moments later Zayn walks into Mias room, Ty in his arms. "Why are you so loud all the time?"

"I feel sick and he hit me." Mia whines.

Zayn lifts an eyebrow up, "He's three and why do you feel sick?" He questions.

"Periods." Mia lies.

Zayn scoffs, "I'm sure." He was always able to see through her fibs. Zayn places Ty down and tells him to go get ready with Liam.

Mia watches as her father comes forward and sits on her bed. It was too early for a lecture about drinking and boyfriends and ugh, all she wants to do is sleep.

"So you and Lucas, huh?" Zayn makes conversation. Mia sits up and leans against the headboard.

"Yeah..." She hesitantly says.

Zayn smiles and grabs her hand, "I was sixteen when I first fell in love with your father and I know we've spoken about this countless of times, but just be safe and never settle for anything less than you deserve."

Mia smiles, her father's words always staying with her ever since she can remember. They've spoken about Zayns life, his feelings and why he left when she was little. Mia used to think he regretted having her but as she gets older, she realizes life isn't as perfect as it appears. Emotions and obstacles get in the way. You're put at two roads and you can't go down both paths, you have to choose. Mia understands where her father comes from and she doesn't resent him for choosing to follow his dreams. He is here now and that is all that will ever matter to her.

"Baba, you know I'd never do anything to let you down."

Zayn shakes his head fondly, "Don't do anything just to please me, whatever you choose in life, I'll always support you."

"Even a teen pregnancy?" Mia jokes.

"Mia," Zayn scolds.

Mia laughs and pushes her father's shoulder playfully, "I'm joking Baba. Having a baby is the last thing on my mind." She promises.

"I know, I know. I just get stressed, is all. I don't want you to make the same mistakes I did." And Mia knows when he says mistake he means choosing work over family. Mia knows that her father never wants her to be in the position he was.

Her biggest insecurity is failing her father's but for some reason, Zayn more than Liam. She wasn't sure why, and maybe there is a deeper part of her that needs to be explored to be understood, but for now, she's content where she is. Her parents are married, she has a new (annoying, lovable) sibling and she's dating her best friend. What more could she wish for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Zayn and Liam live happily ever after. Mia and Lucas get married when they're 25 and have many babies which Ziam will take care of while they work. Ty goes on to become a boxer haha (I just made that all up, but it is 100% a happy ending for all.)
> 
> Thanks for reading and all the comments you left. It's nice to receive and inspires me to continue writing.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading. Hope it wasn't a waste of time.


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